


All Bets are Off

by NobodyKnows_U



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: 5 + 1 Things, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bobby and Athena are everyone parents, Buck calls Bobby dad, Everyone knows about Buck and Eddie, Firefam Feels, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Idiots in Love, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Mutual Pining, POV Multiple, Team as Family, except Buck and Eddie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-11
Updated: 2020-03-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 16:08:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 35,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21750988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NobodyKnows_U/pseuds/NobodyKnows_U
Summary: "Enough!" Bobby sighed, he pinched the bridge of his nose, obviously exhausted. "Alright, I'm gonna need everyone to be completely straight with each other from here on out. No more fighting. Okay?"Hen rolled her eyes but nodded. "Okay Cap.""I'm always straight." Eddie called defensively.Bobby's mouth opened to respond when they heard a strangled chain of coughing behind them. When they turned, they saw Chimney, choking on a bagel."Oh man…" Chimney coaxed through his wheezing. "That's the biggest lie you ever told."Or, the five times the firefam realized Buck and Eddie were in love, and the one-time Eddie finally did something about it.
Relationships: Athena Grant/Bobby Nash, Eddie Diaz (9-1-1) & Bobby Nash, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Athena Grant, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Bobby Nash, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Henrietta "Hen" Wilson, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Howie "Chimney" Han, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Henrietta "Hen" Wilson/Karen Wilson, Maddie Buckley/Howie “Chimney” Han, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 110
Kudos: 1718





	1. Maddie

**Author's Note:**

> I started watching 9-1-1 and immediately fall in love with Buck. And Chimney, and Hen, and Athena and Bobby and Eddie and just pretty much every character on the show. Also I started shipping Eddie and Buck in the second season and they are just... perfect for each other. 
> 
> I haven't written anything in a while... but this just popped in my head and I couldn't help myself. And since there could never be enough fanfiction I wore my own. Anyway, I am sorry for any mistakes up front, it's not beta tested and English is not my first language. But still... I hope someone enjoys it.

Maddie didn’t know what she expected when she came to L.A, she thought it will be a short visit to see her favorite person in the world. She certainly didn’t expect to fall in love, or to finally face her abusive husband, or to find this new family.

She wasn’t complaining.

She still remembered the first time she felt like she joined their little family.

It was a picnic at Athena's house, the whole 118 team was there, along with Karan and Michael. It was such a family gathering; it was like everything Maddie dreamt to have as a child. She almost cried when Athena personally invited her.

After that monthly gathering were a regular thing for her. Only now it was Bobby's and Athena's house.

Now she was sitting next to Chimney, enjoying his arm loosely wrapped at the back of her chair. It was Harry's birthday party so there were more people than usual, yet the people that mattered the most to her were still sited at the same table. She was laughing at a story Hen told them about Denny and their dog when she noticed her brother standing up.

Maddie fallowed Buck with her eye and saw him practically skipping towards the late comers. Eddie and Christopher. Her brother smile was so wide it looked painful; and Christopher's matched.

All she could think was how much they looked like a family. How happy Buck was whenever he was with them. How gentle and kind Buck was around Christopher, and how excited the kid was every time Buck was around. She also couldn’t help but notice the look on Eddie's face as he watched Buck with his son.

Admiration and love.

"God." She exclaimed and put down her beer. "This is so fucking weird." Maddie mumbled to herself.

"What is?" Chimney leaned forwards and rubbed her arm. When Maddie turned to look at him, she saw everyone was staring at her with raised eyebrow.

"Buck." She simply said and pointed at her brother. He was crunched down in front of Christopher as the kid showed him the gift he got Harry; Eddie was standing beside them with a fond smile. "I swear at least three single moms hit on him in the last hour and he just brushed them off. And for as long as I can remember Buck was kinda a manwhore. Not that that’s a bad thing. It's just… weird to see him all grown up. I am so proud."

There was a moment of silence before Hen broke into laughter. "Yeah that’s a mystery…" she snorted into her drink.

Athena choked on her wine and swatted Hen on the arm as she wiped her chin with a napkin.

"Oh, it's not a mystery…" Maddie chuckled and picked up her beer. "He keeps changing the subject every time I bring it up."

"Bring up what?" Michael inquired, slightly lost from their conversation, given he only now joined them.

"His insane boy-crush on Eddie."

"Oh…" Michael said quietly, he seemed to contemplate on the new information.

Athena on the other hand, wore an amused smirk. "I bet Buck's really enjoying it when you do that."

Maddie nodded with a grin. " _Oh, he loves it_." Sarcasm poured from her voice. "Although… he never denied it. So that's something."

_"Really?"_

Bobby raise an eyebrow and shared a look with Hen and Chimney.

"What was than about?" Athena asked curiously before Maddie could.

Hen snickered into her hand and Chimney _giggled_. "Busted Cap."

"Oh, you're in trouble now…" Michael chuckled upon seeing the look Athena send Bobby. He patted the man on the back.

"Bobby?" Athena warned.

"Alright, alright." Bobby gave up, he tried to give Hen and Chimney a stern look but failed when his lips twitched upwards. "We have this bet going around the station…"

" _A bet?"_

Bobby gulped; his eyes widened at the glare his wife gave him.

"Oh, this is gonna be good." Michael leaned over and mumbled into Maddie's ear. She laughed in agreement.

"Bobby…" Athena said again.

Bobby sighed. "We have a bet going on about Eddie and Buck."

"What kind of bet?" Maddie narrowed her eyes. Her gaze bouncing from her boyfriend to Bobby and then back again.

_How come she never heard about it before?_

Hen shrugged. "Nothing too crazy…"

"Just the normal stuff." Chimney chimed in. "You know… when will they finally get their shit together, who will make the first move… you know the standard stuff."

Hen laughed. "We also have one for if one of us catches them making out at the station one day."

"Extra points if this is before they tell people..."

"Bonus points if this is _when_ they get together."

"There's also a bonus round for how many times we catch them staring at each other's asses."

Maddie gaped at them in shook.

_"Oh my god."_

_Her thoughts exactly._

Only… Athena's sounded mad. "Oh my god." She said again and turned to her husband, poking him in the chest. "I can’t believe you would do that!"

Bobby looked down at his lap, shamefully. "Athena I –"

"I can't believe you would do that." Athena repeated, shaking her head. _"Without including us!"_ she added, pointing at Maddie, Karen and Michael.

Bobby stared at her astounded before a grin broke onto his face. One of pure admiration. "I'm sorry." He murmured before leaning in to peck her lips.

"I told you Cap." Hen called out with a shit-eating grin. "Told you she'd want part of the action."

Athena creased Bobby's cheek for a moment with a fond smile before turning to Hen.

"I want in."

"Me too." Maddie quickly jumped at the chance.

"Count me in too." Karen piped up.

Michel nodded. "Same."

Chimney groaned. "Oh, come on!" he cried out. "That's too many people. I want to win!"

"Don't worry Chim." Maddie rubbed his hand. "I'll buy a nice dinner when I win."

Chimney made a face at that. "Ha, ha…it's cute that you think you're going to win."

"Oh, I'm going to win." Maddie assured him. "I know my baby brother like the back of my hand. Trust me. I'll know everything that happens faster than you." She glanced at her brother to make sure he was still busy with Eddie and Christopher

"She's got you there." Karen scoffed. "I bet she knows a bunch of stuff neither of you do."

"Does she now?" Hen asked with a sharp look, straightening up in her chair.

Maddie shrugged coyly. "Maybe… maybe not."

"Care to share with the rest of the class?"

"Well there was this one time when– "

"Heads up." Bobby coughed suddenly, warning them just as Eddie and Buck made their way to the table; Christophe already playing with Denny and the other kids.

The two stopped in their tracks when they saw everyone were staring at them.

"What?" Buck laughed nervously.

"Nothing."

"Is that a new shirt?"

"Whatever do you mean?"

Maddie, Chimney and Hen all said simultaneously.

Eddie's eyebrows nearly reached his hairline and Buck stared right at her with a frown.

She simply raised an eyebrow and he rolled his eyes.

"Okay then…" Buck hummed and settled on the seat next to Hen, Eddie joining him on the empty chair to his right.

"Oh, and _it is_ a new shirt. Thank you for noticing Chim."

Buck gave them all a disappointed look which made them laugh before slowly resuming to their own previous conversations.

Maddie didn’t miss the way Eddie sized up Buck after the shirt comment. His gaze lingering on the blue shirt Buck was wearing; one that did wonders to bring out his eyes.

 _Interesting_.

At that point she knew all about her brother's crush, she did not however, knew much about Eddie's side.

And from the looks of it, it seemed Hella mutual.

To be honest, the way Eddie was shamelessly checking out her little brother made her feel a tad uncomfortable

In fact, after observing the way Eddie rubbed Buck's back, and the way Buck grabbed two beers from the collar, opening both before handing one to Eddie…. the way Eddie kept leering at Buck as he started talking to Bobby and Athena – she came to one simple conclusion.

It was _… pining_.

She felt her lip twitch into an involuntarily smirk. _Oh boy, this is way more than just a crush now._

She thought back to the time she babysat Christophe when Carla couldn’t due to her husband's birthday… she thought about how Buck fallowed Eddie through the door looking tired as hell, yet still plastered on a smile upon seeing Christopher. The way she offered her brother a ride home and Buck didn’t get a chance to reply before Eddie told him he could stay the night. How Buck blushed, stuttered an unclear objection and Eddie cutting him off.

_"Don’t be stupid, I have a guest room for a reason. Besides, Chris will be thrilled to see you in the morning."_

The moment Eddie mentioned his son the argument was his, Buck could never say no to the kid. He'll do anything to make him happy; to make them both happy. And Maddie remembered smiling at the way her brother succumbed to Eddie's pleading eyes before biding her goodnight.

Her brother was so far gone… and he didn’t even realize. And he wasn’t the only one.

All the longing and the yearning… all the unnecessary worry.

Like the time Buck cut his hand on broken glass and Eddie wouldn’t stop fussing over him.

_"Dude it's just a scratch –"_

_"Not to someone on blood thinners! Now sit your ass down and let me take care of it."_

There was also the time Eddie had the flu and Maddie assisted by dropping off the groceries for chicken soup at Eddie's. She remembered giving her brother a look. He was wearing an apron, cooking dinner for Christopher while the kid did homework at the table. And her eyes darted from them to Eddie, passed out on the couch surrounded by tissues. Buck had simply taken the bags from her and avoided her gaze. He tossed the groceries on the counter before striding towards the sofa and throwing the comforter over Eddie.

It was so… _domestic_. Such a married thing to do. It reminded her of her marriage to Doug. The good parts of it at least.

Come to think of it, it wasn’t the first time someone thought that of them.

_"Yo, get this Mads. This elf at Santa's shop thought Eddie and I were married. She told me we had an adorable kid."_

_"Uh huh…and what did you say to that?"_

_"Umm…Isaidthankyou."_

_"What was that?"_

_"I said… thank you."_

_"Buck –"_

_"Oh, shut up!"_

She laughed at the memory. Buck had flushed and refused to look her in the eye for a week after that.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Chimney giving her weird look. "What so funny?" he whispered in her ear.

"Just thinking…"

"About?"

"What an idiot my brother is being."

Chimney tried to cover up his snort with a cough. Which only made Buck glare at them from across the table. Maddie simply waved at him innocently; he did not buy it but went back to his conversation with Eddie non the less.

Eddie might think he was being all subtle by putting his hand on the back of his chair, slightly leaning to the side… but he wasn’t fooling Maddie. She could see the way the tip of his fingers grazed Buck's shoulder, and the way Buck gravitated towards him without noticing.

They acted like a married couple and it was getting infuriating to watch them be oblivious.

Deep down Maddie knew far too well why Buck would be hesitant to start something with Eddie, to give in and be happy. After the hell their parents put them through, their shame of a marriage and then her own marriage... They did not get to see how a heathy, loving relationship works growing up, which led to a few mistakes when they got older. She knew Buck was frighten to try something real, something _good_. Scared it will turn into a nightmare like everything else. Scared Eddie would leave like everyone else.

And perhaps after seeing all the relationships around him now, like Bobby and Athena, Hen and Karan and her and Chimney… perhaps it will aid ease his fears. She really hoped it will.

But he was not _there_ yet.

Nether was Eddie. After the last year, with losing Shannon, and the tsunami and lawsuit... he and Buck were finally in a good place. They were good. Eddie was good. He was smiling again, and it wasn’t fake. He was happy, he was moving on and letting go of all that anger he had pent up inside of him. Maddie remembered the talk she had with Eddie about his therapy, he was doing great. He was getting there.

Her brother was happy in the little bubble he and Eddie got stuck in. The domestic co-parenting routine he was so blissfully roped in. it was the happiest she had ever seen him.

It made her heart swoon with joy.

She could grasp that the moment they passed that thin line in their relationship _–_ that threshold into _something better –_ that they'd be _whole. They'd be happy._

_They just weren’t ready yet._

They didn’t mind waiting a little.

And neither did she. She will wait. And once they get there, she was going to give Eddie one hell of a talk.

Maddie felt a familiar touch crass her arm and smiled when Chimney's worried face came into her view.

"You good?"

And she laughed.

Cause yeah. She was more than good. She was free. Free of Doug. Free of her parents. She finally had a life. A job she loved. Her brother by her side. A sweet man that she adored with all her heart. And she had all of them. A family. A family that's better than anything she could ever dream of.

" _Yeah. I'm good."_


	2. Hen

Hen was getting frustrated.

And it wasn’t even for herself. She was getting frustrated for her friends. Her _idiot_ friends.

She didn’t have enough fingers to count the number of times some stranger assumed Buck and Eddie were together. It was getting ridiculous. It was always the same, Buck would get flustered and Eddie would blush like a maiden and avoid eye contact as they'd laugh it off.

Today was a bit different.

Aside from the regular drama and blood during their call, there was also the part when the woman they saved fluttered her eyelashes seductively at Buck and offered to buy him a drink for his troubles. Buck simply laughed anxiously and ran a hand through his hair. He was about to turn her down when Eddie, who was standing next to him, rolled his eyes in annoyance and bumped Buck's shoulder before storming off.

Buck started after Eddie like a confused lost puppy. The women glanced between Buck, who's cheeks turned a shade of pink to Eddie, who was sulking near the truck before sighing.

 _"Of course. The hot ones are always gay. I'm sorry. I didn’t know you were married."_ She brushed her hand over Buck's bicep, lingering far too long. And Hen had to fight the urge to roll her eyes too.

Buck, on his end, let out a shy laugh and opened his mouth to answer but couldn’t seem to find the words. The women chuckled and thanked them all one more time before leaving.

Now, twenty minutes later they were back at the station, waiting for the launch Bobby was preparing.

Hen was lounging at the couch with Chimney, discussing the trip he was planning to surprise Maddie with. Eddie had stepped away to take a call and Buck was pacing around, tossing the water bottle in his hand back and forth.

"Everything okay?" Chimney asked after Buck dropped the bottle for the fifth time in a raw.

Buck shook his head and sat sown on the sofa's arm beside him.

"It's just… why… I mean… "

Hen frowned. "What's wrong Buckaroo?"

Buck sighed and twisted the bottle in his hand before he started to peel off the label. "It's just… why do everyone always think Eddie and I are married?"

Hen arched an eyebrow and Buck didn’t miss the look she shared with Chimney.

" _What?_ "

_"You kidding right?"_

It was Buck's turn to frown. "No." he said, looking utterly bewildered. He seemed to ponder at the question.

Chimney mumbled something that sounded a lot like _'holy fucking shit_ ' and Hen chuckled.

"Don’t overthink it Buckaroo."

"But –"

"Does it really bother you that much if people think you are married to Eddie?" Chimney asked with a pointed look.

Buck blinked. He started to panic once he realized what Chimney was insinuating. "I – No! I don’t… I mean you know I'm… I don’t – You know I don’t – but – " he kept stammering like a fool until Hen took a pity on him.

"Relax. Chim's just messing with you." She glared at Chimney judgingly and he laughed.

Before anyone could say anything else the siren filled the station, notifying them duty called.

The three of them let out a collective groan before rushing down the stairs, fallowing their captain. Eddie was the last to hop on the truck, tucking his phone to his pocket.

"Everything okay?" Buck wondered, concerned.

"Yeah. It was just my abuela, she got off work early. She said she'll pick Christopher up from school, take him for ice-cream. Had to call Carla to let her know."

Buck beamed at the mention of Christopher. "Oh, the little dude's gonna love that. You know she should totally take him to that place at…"

Eddie nodded along. He had a tender expression on his face as he stared at his best-friend going on and on about his son. He was so far gone.

 _Oh, that poor idiot._ Hen thought to herself. _He got it bad._

She felt Chimney nudge her side and when she looked over he was rolling his eyes, pointing with his chin towards Buck and Eddie sitting across from them.

Buck was still talking about Christopher with a wide smile and a twinkle in his eyes. He was using wild hand gestures as he spoke about that time he picked up the kid from school and took him to the zoo.

And Eddie… Eddie was _gawking_ at Buck, with that stupid, smitten smile still plastered to his face.

 _That poor bastard._ Hen thought again.

The ride was smooth and fast. Once they arrived their call, they all had their game faces on.

It was an amusement park. Two children were stuck on top of the ferries wheel. The ride broke down, the whole thing seemed unstable. The rest of the civilians who were on the ride managed to get off before it broke down completely. Only the two girls were still stuck, right at the top.

She noticed Athena questioning the owner in the corner. She could hear her harsh voice all the way to the truck.

" _It's says here you hadn’t had a proper inspection in over a year. Care to explain why you allow people, children, on that ride when you know it's unsafe?"_

Hen could tell Athena was furious as the man tried to deny her accusations. And when she looked back at the ferris wheel she had to forcefully push away the thought of Denny being the one up there.

Calls like that… that involved kids, they were always the hardest.

They got to work quickly, Bobby barking orders left and right. Hen and Chimney began to cheek on the people who were on the wheel while Buck and Eddie went up the ladder. And Bobby tried to calm down the freaked-out parents and keep them out of the way.

Somehow, no one was hurt too badly.

Eddie and Buck worked quickly, climbing up the ride. Eddie reached the girls, talking calmly until they agreed to hold on to him. He attached them to the harness, slowly lowering them one at a time to Buck who waited at the top of the ladder.

A while later Buck was handing her a scared six-year-old as he reached the bottom of the ladder. Her older sister was already enveloped by her parents not far away. And Hen slowly handed the girl to her father after making sure she wasn’t injured.

"Piece of cake." Buck huffed has he jumped to the ground, wearing a proud smirk.

Hen joined his side and clasped him on the back. She was about to reply when the sound of metal cracking and someone's shouting made her blood run cold.

_"What out!"_

They both looked up in horror, just in time as a bar-wire from one of the seats collapsed. Right onto Eddie. Eddie who was still halfway down the ladder.

_"Eddie!"_

Buck screamed beside her and Hen nails dug into his arm. She watched with dread as Eddie plumped to the ground a few feet away from them.

The world seemed to freeze for a moment, before they all sprang into action. Buck arrived at Eddie's side first, gently ripping off the helmet and examining his head.

"Eddie?" Buck's voice was quiet, terrified. "Eddie wake up. Come on man! _Please_ …"

Hen landed on her knees beside them just when Bobby and Chimney arrived. She and Chimney shared an entire conversion with just one look.

_It's just another call. It's wasn’t their friend right now; it was just another person who needs their help._

They began to check Eddie over, and Hen felt a pang in her heart as Buck kept talking to Eddie. she understood him, she'd be devastated if she was in his shoes. If it was Karen laying there.

W _ait…_

_Since when does comparing Eddie and Buck's not -so-unspoken thing to her and wife's relationship became so easy?_

_Unless…_

Hen watched Buck stroke Eddie's hair while Chimney and Bobby strapped a neck-brace on him and loaded him to a stretcher. And all she can think is _– holy shit!_

She's not sure when the line from innocent crush and ridicules amount of pant up sexual tension moved to full on, head-over heels in love stage. But it did.

And just… _wow._

And in retrospect, she probably shouldn’t be having this epiphany while her friend is lying unconscious on a gurney and being wheeled onto an ambulance… but _holy shit._

It’s not every day that you realize that _reformed womanizer Even Buckley is fucking in love_.

"Hen?" she half recognized Chimney calling out her name. "Hen!"

She shook her head, as if to pull herself out of her thoughts, and looked at her best-friend.

"You okay?"

"Yeah." She said. "Just a bit shaken up." She looked at Eddie as he was loaded on the ambulance. _Please god, let him be alright._

"Hum." Chimney nodded, glancing to his right. "You're doing a lot better than Buck though."

Hen fallowed his gaze and saw Bobby towering over Buck who was leaning on the back of the truck. It looked like their Captain was trying to talk Buck down from a panic attack.

" _Breath_." She heard Bobby say. "He'll be okay, kiddo. Just breath."

Buck grabbed onto Bobby's arm tightly as he kept sucking in deep breaths and Bobby simply rubbed his shoulder soothingly.

" _There you go Buckaroo. Just breath."_

Chimney sighed next to her. "I really hope Eddie's okay."

"He's a tough one. He'll pull trough. He definitely dislocated his shoulder, but he'll live."

"You're right." Chimney tore his gaze away from Buck. "So, you think this will finally make them get their head out of their asses?"

Hen let out a half-hearted chuckle. "I don't know. They're both absurd when it comes to each other. This might even put a dent in the progress."

Chim groaned as she led him inside the truck, deciding it's best to give Buck his privacy.

_"I am never gonna win the bet, am I?"_

\--

She was right.

Eddie had dislocated his shoulder. He also had a concussion. And the doctors wanted to keep him for another day for observation, which is how she found herself at his bed side the next day. They had all fussed over Eddie as they rushed into the hospital and after learning he'll be okay, they returned to their shift. Even a reluctant Buck.

Buck of course, went back to the hospital the minute the shift ended, Maddie even informed them he stayed the whole night.

It was her day off and Karen was still at work and her wife told her she'd pick up Denny from school on her way home… so she had some time to kill. Hen figured she'd keep Eddie some company for a bit. Relive him from the insufferable mother-hen that is Buck.

To her surprise, Buck wasn’t there when she arrived.

"Glad to see you're doing alright. Where's lover-boy?" she raised her eyebrows. Wondering if she should feel guilty at the pleasure she took when Eddie turned red.

"He left about two hours ago. I told him to go home. He looked like a wreck."

Hen laughed and sat down. "I figured. He stayed at your bedside all night."

She sent Eddie a knowing smirk and he rolled his eyes.

"You know he was really worried about you."

"I know. Bobby told me."

Hen narrowed her eyes at that. She doubted Bobby told him about Buck's panic attack.

"So, what did you do today?"

She knew what he was doing, changing the subject. But she played along.

"Nothing much. Did some errands. Bought groceries, cleaned the house… then I decided to come here and give _your boo_ a break, but I see you already took care of it."

Eddie nodded, hiding his blush under his hand as he rubbed his face. He did not respond to the _boo_ remark.

"How's Christopher?" she cleared her throat after a long moment of silence.

"He was freaked out a little when I talked to him on the phone. He wanted to come visit me. But I'm getting discharged in a few hours… figured it better to have him stay with my abuela for the night. She will bring him to the house after school."

"That's nice – "

She was cut off by a sudden scream.

 _"Daddy!_ "

Before they knew it, Christopher's bright face came into the room, followed closely by Buck.

"Hey!" Eddie's face immediately lit up at the sight of his son. "What are you doing here buddy?"

He sat up in his bed and Buck gently pressed a hand to his chest to push him back down. He then carefully hoisted Christopher up onto the bed so he could hug his father.

 _And damn._ Hen thought. _That boy just keeps proving himself to be perfect husband material._ And if the look of awe on Eddie's face was any indication… he thought so too.

"Be careful little man." Buck said warily. "Your dad has a bad arm right now."

Eddie waved him off and wrapped his good hand around his son. "It's fine." He nuzzled his face in Christopher hair. "How was school kiddo?"

Christopher looked up and beamed. "It was great dad. Buck picked me up from school, said we're going to surprise you."

Eddie raised an eyebrow and glared at Buck. "I see that." he said, amused.

Buck shuffled on his feet. "I hope it's okay. I didn’t mean to overstep. I mean you kept talking about how you want to see Chris, so I talked to your abuela… she said it's okay." He was sounding less sure with every word.

"Buck…" Eddie called out softly. "It's fine, _thank you_."

Buck did that thing with his lashes Hen noted to herself. That thing he only did _around Eddie._ Her heart swelled up at the sight of their little family.

_Oh, these clueless idiots._

But to be honest, their intense eye contact was starting to make her feel unmotorable.

"Dad?"

Luckily, Christopher's voice broke it apart and made Eddie turn to his son.

" _Yeah mijo?"_

The way Christopher giggled made Hen think he was up to something. It was in no way an innocent laugh. They always said that kid was too smart for his age.

"Do you remember Miss. Collins?"

Eddie brows furrowed. "Your art teacher?"

Christopher nodded, too eagerly.

"Chris –" Buck interjected but the kid ignored him.

"She gave Bucky her phone number." Christopher giggled again, peering up to see his father's reaction.

Something switched in Eddie's expression. It went a bit dark. " _Oh…_ did she now?" he asked, sweetly, too sweetly.

_Oh man, if only she had popcorn._

Buck remained glued awkwardly to his spot; he rubbed the back of his neck and send Eddie an apologetic smile.

"Hey what can I do?" Buck raise his hands up. "The ladies can't resist this, especially when they see me with a kid." He gestured to his body and winked at Christopher. "Who knew this little guy will make the best wing-man of them all?"

Eddie muttered something in Spanish under his breath.

And Hen had to bite her lip to stop her laughter. She couldn’t believe what she was seeing. _It was gold._

And judging by that knowing little smirk Christopher gave her, he knew exactly what he was doing.

"Are you gonna call her?" Eddie's voice may have been perfectly calm, but his face? It was there for only a second, but Hen saw that look of pure jealousy and annoyance.

"Neha man." Buck waved his hand. "I got my hands full."

Eddie visibly relaxed at that as he adjusted Christopher on his lap. "Oh, that's too bad." He claimed.

Hen never heard such bullshit in her life.

"No. it's fine." Buck shrugged and took a seat at the edge of the bed. "Besides, dating is the farthest thing from my mind right now."

" _Oh_."

Hen could swear that Eddie looked nothing less than disappointed. And she wanted to smack them both across the head so bad.

_These clueless idiots._

She should absolutely smack them, she contemplated on doing just that when she was startled by the abrupt notification of her phone. She took it out and saw a text from her wife.

_Picked up Denny. Be home soon. Hope you bought chocolate <3_

"Shoot." She sighed _. Damn she forgot about Karen's pregnancy craving She'd have to pick some up on the way home._

"Duty calls?" Buck voice called out, and that bastard was wiggling his eyebrows _._

Hen rolled her eyes to his antics. "I need to get home. Karen picked up Denny." She told them, pushing herself up from her chair. She shoved Buck playfully and turned to Eddie and Christopher, giving them both a hug. She added a kiss on the cheek for Christophe, whispering in his ear.

" _Good job little man_."

Christopher giggled loudly and high-fived her; ignoring Buck and Eddie's confused look.

"Watch over these two." She told him before patting Buck on the shoulder and heading out the room.

When she passed the door, she glanced back and saw Buck smiling at something Christopher said and Eddie staring at them fondly.

They looked so much like a family it warmed her heart. These three deserved nothing but happiness. Which they found with each other.

_Now, if only two of them could get their head of their ass._

Shaking her head she looked down at her phone. Hen thought for a second before pulling up the group chat, rolling her eyes at the new title Chimney chose on.

_All's fair in love and war **.**_

**_Hen:_ ** _I think Christopher might want in on the pool. That kid is way ahead of us XD_

The respond was almost immediate _._

**_Chim:_ ** _No way! I am not getting out bested by a child! No matter how adorable he is!_

 **_Maddie:_ ** _Give it a rest Chim. What happened?_

 **_Athena:_ ** _Sounds like there's a story there. Do tell._

 **_Hen:_ ** _Buck picked Christopher up from school so he could see Eddie… apparently one of his teachers hit on him. The kid totally sold him out to his father._

 **_Maddie:_ ** _Oh. My. God._

 **_Maddie:_ ** _Have I mentioned how much I love that kid?_

 **_Maddie_ ** _: Please tell me you have it on video._

 **_Cap:_ ** _That must have gone down well._

 **_Athena:_ ** _Let me guess… Eddie did not like that._

 **_Chim:_ ** _Oh please, please, don’t tell me Eddie got all jealous and Buck still didn’t get the memo…_

Hen chuckled, that's exactly what happened.

**_Hen:_ ** _I'm afraid I can't._

 **_Cap:_ ** _*sighing emoji *_

 **_Athena:_ ** _*face palm emoji*_

 **_Maddie:_ ** _Oh no… no._

 **_Maddie:_ ** _WHY BUCK WHY?_

 **_Chim:_ ** _At this rate we'd have to forgo the bet and just shove them into one of the closets._

 **_Cap:_ ** _Not at my station you won't!_

 **_Hen:_ ** _Actually, I agree with Chim. It might be the only thing that will work._

 **_Maddie:_ ** _DO IT!_

 **_Athena:_ ** _They do have a point. Buck – bless his heart – is as oblivious as they come. Eddie is no better. It might be the only option._

 **_Cap:_ ** _You can't be serious._

 **_Athena:_ ** _Think about it, we all want them to be happy._

 **_Athena:_ ** _And so far, nothing is working. This might get things going._

 **_Chim:_ ** _YES! I'm telling you guys it will work. Trust me._

_**Hen:** Oh please._

**_Hen:_ ** _You just don’t want to lose the bet._

 **_Chim:_ ** _How dare you assume I will put the wellbeing and happiness of my dear friends over some stupid bet!_

 **_Maddie:_ ** _I call bullshit!_

 **_Athena:_ ** _Second it._

 **_Hen:_ ** _*raised eyebrow emoji*_

 **_Chim:_ ** _Alright fine you got me. But I'm telling you… it WILL work._

 **_Cap:_ ** _No. Nobody will be locking no one anywhere._

 **_Cap:_ ** _Not under my roof._

 **_Chim:_ ** _Oh, come on Cap! You caught Buck in way worse positions before…_

 **_Chim:_ ** _what's one more time? For old times' sake?_

 **_Athena:_ ** _I don’t think that's the way to get him to agree Chim._

 **_Maddie:_ ** _In fact, you might have just made it worse._

 **_Hen:_ ** _I say screw that. Let's just lock them in the buckers! I'm tired of all the sexual tension during my breakfast._

 **_Cap:_ ** _Wilson! Don't give him any more ideas!_

 **_Chim:_ ** _That's even better!_

 **_Hen:_ ** _Too late…_

 **_Chim:_ ** _We'll leave some candles, a little music and then some bow-chicka-bow-wow later… Presto! We're all free._

 **_Chim:_ ** _We might end up scarred for life, but it will be worth it._

_*Cap had left the group chat_ _*_

Hen laughed so hard she almost dropped her phone. Some people passing by looked at her funny when she entered the parking lot. Probably because she was straggling to breath.

As she got into her car her phone buzzed again.

**_Athena:_ ** _Oh, you've done it now._

 **_Maddie:_ ** _Good luck with the rest of your shift Chim._

 **_Chim:_ ** _*nervous emoji*_

 **_Chim:_ ** _Shit._

Hen shook her head; glad she was not in Chimney's shoes right now.

As she drove home, she couldn’t help but think… _Maybe locking Buck and Eddie in a room together is their best bet_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the nice reviews, I am really glad you liked it.  
> I really enjoyed writing this chapter, especially because the next one will be more angsty...  
> Hope you liked the story so far.


	3. Chimney

If he learned something from dating Maddie it was to not push her about her past. He had to let her come to him.

He never pushed her to talk, he always waited.

He did not expect things to come out like this.

It started out as a normal day at work. They were hanging out at the kitchen, waiting for Bobby to wipe out lunch when Maddie strolled in.

That part was normal, it wasn’t unusual for her to join them for launch or breakfast sometimes.

" _Maddie_?"

It was Hen's voice that made him notice her.

What wasn’t normal was the way his girlfriend carried herself. She dragged herself forwards with every step, hesitant, shocked. He wasn’t sure how she made it up the stairs.

Chimney was at her side in seconds, gently grabbing her hand and guiding her to the table. Once Maddie was tucked in the chair, he crunched down in front of her and rubbed her leg trying to get her attention. Because as far as he could tell, Maddie didn’t seem to notice anything that happened; it was like she walked around like a zombie.

He looked up at his teammates and saw they were all watching with concern; Bobby even forgo the food but turned off the stove before standing beside them, arms over his chest, ready. Hen took a seat next to Maddie and rubbed her shoulder while Eddie grabbed a glass of water and placed it on the table.

"Maddie." Chimney tried, squeezing her leg a little. "Maddie what happened?"

His voice seemed to break her out of her trance. She looked at him and her lip trembled before she shook her head. "Buck." She managed to say with a shaky voice. "Where's Buck?"

Chimney frowned. "Buck's here. He's in the shower, things got messy at our last call." He said. "Do you want me to go get him?"

At that Maddie burst into tears. "I don't know."

"What do you mean?"

Maddie took a few deep breaths and whipped her cheeks and nose with the tissue Eddie handed her. "I got a call today. A few hours ago. And I just… been walking around trying to wrap my head around it." She sobbed and closed her eyes.

For a moment she didn't say anything, and Chimney started to panic. Not knowing what to do he was about to go get Buck when Maddie spoke, in a small, broken voice.

_"Our dad died."_

"What?" Eddie was the first to break the silence and Chimney heard Bobby offer his condolence form his spot behind him.

Chimney didn’t know what to say. To be honest, he never heard either of the Buckley siblings talk about their parents. _Never._ He wasn’t sure what was the story there, instead of saying anything he simply squeezed Maddie's leg harder in support.

"Oh my god." Hen said, putting a hand over her mouth. "I am so sorry."

Maddie took in a breath. " _Don’t be_." She spat out the words like venom.

"Maddie," Bobby started as he stepped closer." He was your father –"

_"He was a bastard."_

Nobody dared to move or speak. They could only stare at the murderous look on Maddie's face.

She took a deep breath before looking at them again.

"He was a shitty father." Maddie said quietly, like she was afraid. "Our parents got divorced when Buck was like six. They made each other miserable. Buck doesn’t really remember it, all the yelling and the fighting… it was awful. Then they finally got divorced and our mother just took the money and split, we only saw her like three times a year. And our father…."

Maddie got silent and more tears escaped her eye. Chimney took her hand. "You don't have to talk about it if you don’t want –"

Maddie shook her head. "No, it's fine." She wiped her tears and continued with a shaky voice. "Our father was a drunk. A mean drunk who took his anger out on his kids because his wife left him. He made our lives hell. So much so that I thought it was better to run away with Doug than stay home with him. At first I regretted not taking Buck with me… but after seeing Doug's true colors…" She let out a broken laugh.

"Sometimes I still think it might have been better if I took Buck with me. He never talks about how things were at home after I left. But I know it wasn’t good."

Chimney felt like someone spilled a bucket of ice on him. All he could see was red. He very rarely felt the anger he felt now. And not just for Maddie, for Buck too. He felt Eddie stiff behind him and knew his friend was sharing his exact same feelings on the situation.

It did explain a lot though. All these times Buck would flinch whenever someone yelled too loudly, how careful his friend was the first time they went drinking; almost as if he was afraid how Chimney would act drunk… it broke his heart now that he knew why.

"Maddie…" It was Bobby's voice that broke him from his thoughts. He stepped closer and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. "It wasn’t your fault. You were a kid,"

Maddie looked up at him with a broken smile. "You know that's why Buck looks up to you so much. You were more of a father to him than our father ever was."

Bobby looked taken at back by that sentiment. He opened his mouth to say something when they heard footsteps climbing up the stairs.

A second later Buck came into the kitchen, his smile quickly falling the moment he took in the scene in front of him.

"Hey guys – _what happened_?" he asked in concern, taking in their gloom faces. He took a step closer. "Maddie? What's wrong?"

"Buck…" Eddie started softly. "Maybe you should sit down." He placed a hand on Buck's chest, stopping him from going farther.

Buck frowned but took a seat anyways. He could never say no to Eddie. "What happened?"

Nobody said anything for a minute. Eventually Chimney cleared his throat and rose to his feet. He placed a long kiss to Maddie's head before signaling to the other to fallow him. "We'll leave you guys to talk."

Maddie nodded in gratitude before turning to her brother. " _Listen Evan…_ "

"Shit. _It's never anything good when you call me that."_

Chimney did his best to tone out their voices, wanting to give the siblings their privacy. He had to push Eddie to get him to leave. The man looked torned between giving them space and wanting to comfort Buck, which he could sympathies with.

"Come on." He urged Eddie down the stairs. Once they joined Bobby and Hen downstairs Bobby gave them a stern look.

Eddie looked like he was about to argue when Bobby spoke. "Give them time. Let him come to you."

Eddie sighed. "I know." He leaned on the wall and rubbed his face. "It's just I can't believe that… he never told me that…"

"He never told us either." Hen said softly, her motherly side seemed to come out because she looked like all she wanted was to hug Buck and comfort him in a way only a mother could. "I've known the guy for three years… never heard him talk about his parents. Now we know why."

Eddie had a dark look in his eyes at her words. Chimney knew that look; he was pretty sure he had that same look on his own face.

" _I just wanna –_ "

They'll never know what Eddie was about to say when a loud crash echoed from upstairs. They stared at each other for a spilt second before running to the kitchen. Chimney tripped on his feet by how fast he was going.

He didn’t know what he expected to see but it wasn’t Buck breathing heavily, surrounded by broken wood pieces that used to be a chair, a noticeable dent on the table… all while Maddie sobbed in the corner.

Buck was _, pissed_. None of them ever saw Buck like this. For as long as Chimney knew him, he never saw him like that. He was never angry.

" _Evan, stop!"_

Buck didn't seem to listen, instead he grabbed the water glass from the table and smashed it against the wall. The sound ringed in his ears, it made Maddie flinch.

"Evan!" she called weakly. " _Please_."

Buck was shakings, it looked like Buck was about to throw another glass and Chimney was about to step in when he felt a hand on his shoulder. _Bobby._

Bobby walked to Buck and grabbed his wrist before the glass met the same fate as the other. "Buck." He said loudly and Buck… Buck winced.

"Kid. Look at me please."

Buck slowly turned around, his face was tear stained and he looked in so much pain. But more than that, he looked scared. Scared of Bobby.

Bobby noticed, he let go of Buck's hand and made sure to speak calmly and quietly as people started to circle them, checking out the commotion.

" _You're scaring your sister_."

Buck blinked and turned to Maddie. As if noticing her distraught state for the first time. "Shit." He cursed. "Shit. Maddie I'm sorry –" he made a move towards her, but she backed away on a reflex.

Buck looked like he got slapped. He took a step back and put his head in his hands. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry Mads." He murmured.

"Buck." Bobby said. "Why don't you take the rest of the day off. Calm down and –"

"Yeah that's probably a good idea." Buck cut him off. He sighed before glancing at Maddie one more time before walking past them.

Maddie seemed to unfreeze by these words, she walked after her brother and called after him.

"Buck wait –"

"Maddie I'm sorry." Buck stopped. "Look I just need a moment to…" he looked uneasy on his feet, unable to look his sister in the eye. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

He sounded like a scared child; he cowered, afraid of her reaction.

" _I'm so sorry."_

Maddie face soften at that. "Buck, it's okay just…" she cupped his cheek making him look at her. "Call me if you need me okay?" she asked before hugging him tightly.

Buck nodded, burring his face in her shoulder. He sniffed before letting her go and practically running out of the station.

Chimney didn’t know what to feel. He was torn. On one hand, he was pissed at Buck for leaving his girlfriend in such a shattered condition. On the other hand, he could sympathies with his friend.

He slightly acknowledged Bobby's voice next to him.

_"Eddie. Give him time. He'll come to you when he's ready."_

Chimney speared a glance at his friend. Eddie looked like he wanted to threw caution to the wind, ignore Bobby's advice and run after Buck.

And Chimney had to give it to the guy for listening to logic and staying put.

When he looked back at his girlfriend, Maddie looked lost. She hugged herself as she dunked her head, staring at the floor as she obviously cried.

"Maddie?" Chimney tried, stepping towards his girlfriend. "Are you okay?"

Maddie nodded but put a hand up, letting him know she didn’t want to be touched. So, Chimney took a step back.

"I'm fine. It's just…." She grimaced and walked towards the mess on the floor. Slowly bending down to pick it up.

"I haven't seen him like this since…" she became still. "It just brings up bad memories you know…"

Chimney gave her a small nod and squatted beside her, helping her pick up the mess. Maddie kept silently crying while they cleaned up. He heard Hen, Eddie and Bobby swap up the glass shreds by the wall.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Maddie tensed. Her eyes darted from him to the others working behind them. "It's our mother." She finally spoke quietly. "It's a touchy subject for Buck."

"You're mother?" Chimney started carefully, not wanting to upset her more. "What about her?"

"She uh… she's –" Maddie voice shook. "She's not a good mother, let put it at that. After our dad won the custody, she took the divorce settlement and she split. She took the money and moves halfway across the country. It's like she just stopped caring about us, not that she did much before. All she cares about is money and her booze. She just abandoned us with him. She calls sometimes to cheek up but other than that... she doesn’t really care."

Chimney sensed the bitterness in his girlfriend's voice. And his heart broke once more for the Buckley siblings. How could two, two of the most amazing people he ever knew, come from these… these _monsters._ "Maddie I – I'm so sorry."

He didn’t know what else to say. He wanted to tell her how incredibly strong she was, how amazing she was. How much he loved her and how much he wished he could help her forgot all these terrible memories. But the words didn’t seem to find him.

"I know." Maddie gave him a sad smile. "She's the one who called me to let me know." She said suddenly. "She wanted to know if Buck and I are coming to the funeral. Which is basically her asking if we want our part of the will."

Chimney started at her shocked. He partly realized the voices of the rest of his team had quite down, clearly, they were listening too. "Maddie that's... that's terrible."

"Yeah well…" Maddie went back to the pile on the floor, she slowly began to pick up the pieces up the trash again. "I'm used to her. But Buck… Buck only remembers the good parts of her. It was always harder for him. That's why…" she gestured to the mess,

Chimney nodded slowly, he leaned forwards and grabbed her hand, making her look up at him. "Hey. It's okay you don’t need to explain."

"It's just… I never really talked about it with anyone. I was always kinda… _ashamed_."

"Maddie, you have nothing to be ashamed about." Bobby stepped in front of them, taking the words out of Chimney's mouth. " _Nothing_ , the only ones who should be ashamed are your parents."

Maddie started at Bobby for a long moment. She swallowed roughly before nodding. Chimney was about to stand up and bring a broom when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up at his captain.

"Chim." Bobby said, stepping closer to him. "Why don’t you let us handle this. Maybe you should take the rest of the day off as well." He tilted his head towards Maddie.

"I –"

"No, it's fine." Maddie cut in, getting up from the floor.

"Mads – "

"It's okay." She gave him a reassuring smile. "Really." She took his hand. "I'll be fine. I think I just need to be alone right now."

Chimney gulped. "Alright." He squeezed her hand tightly. "Call me, alright. Whatever you need."

Maddie nodded, she leaned in to kiss his lips softly and turned to apologize to the rest of team – who assured her it was fine – before turning to leave.

They all watched her leave from the railing, she staggered with each step. And Chimney felt the urge to raise their father from the grave just so he could kill him himself.

"Well…" Hen started once they finished cleaning up, her voice unsteady. "That was –"

"Yeah." Bobby nodded sadly, he shook a little as he walked back to the stove, probably trying to keep himself busy and calm by cooking.

"I just can't believe…" Hen slowly sunk on the couch. "They don't deserve this."

Eddie nodded as he dropped down next to her and rubbed his face. "I can't believe someone could treat their children like that. it’s revolting."

Chimney went over to the table, he leaned on it, arms crossed. "It's disgusting." He agreed.

"It is." Bobby said, standing between them as he wiped his hands on a towel. "These two deserve much better than what they got. But despite all that they turned out alright. And they have us to be there for them now."

Chimney nodded and looked at the ground. _The rest of their shift is going to be hell._

\--

He called Maddie the moment Bobby sent them home. She told him she was fine, but that she couldn’t get a hold of Buck and she was worried.

He offered to look for him. Which is how he spend a half hour searching for his friend. After checking his place and noting his car wasn’t there he decided to look elsewhere.

Chimney found him eventually, at the bar.

Buck sat by the counter, empty shot glasses around him and a beer bottle in his hand. He looked miserable.

"Hey man." Chimney said carefully when he reached his friend. He signaled to the bartender for a glass of water.

Buck looked up and sighed. "Hey. How's Maddie?"

"She's hanging in there. She asked for some space, so I thought I'll cheek in on you."

Buck nodded. Guilt washed over him at the thought of his sister. He played with his bottle nervously. "I – that's good."

Chimney sighed. "How are you holding up?"

"She told you huh? I'm fine."

Chimney arched an eyebrow. "You sure? Doesn’t look like you're fine."

"Well I am so…." Buck said bitterly, taking a huge gulp from his beer, waving to the bartender to give him another one. "I am just dandy!"

"Buck –"

 _"What do you want me to say?_ " Buck cried out, slamming his beer on the counter.

"You want me to tell you how my father used to beat the shit out of me every other day? That the kids at school would make fun of me for the way I had to drees to cover the bruises? That the closes to 'I love you' I ever heard from him was _'maybe you're not a mistake after all'._ "

Chimney went rigid. Buck's voice was so _raw_ , so _broken,_ so _vulnerable._ He never heard Buck sound like that. He never heard so much pain in his voice. It was like he snapped under the weight of it all. Chimney had to take deep breathes to stop his own urge to threw everything he could reach. Nobody deserved to have a childhood like that.

"Look man, I don’t know what it's like. I can't imagine how you must feel. But I'm here for you."

Buck still wouldn’t look at him and Chimney heard him sniff. The bartender brought them the water and another beer and Buck drowned it down.

"Buck." Chimney said. "If you want to talk about it, let's talk about it. If you want to talk about something else… we'll do that. Whatever you want. I'm here for you."

Buck only nodded. They sat in silence for five minutes before he decided to talk.

"I saw him hitting my mom once." Buck voice was so quite that for a minute Chimney wasn't sure if he even spoke. "I was pretty young, so I think I blocked it. I mean… I'm still not sure if it really happened. What I do know, is that the first time I saw him hit Maddie… that was real. _I was seven_."

Buck let out a strangled noise before continuing. "I didn't do anything that time, I was scared. I heard her crying all night. The next time it happened I tried to stop him, I got a knockout punch to the face. Maddie was screaming and crying, and our dad just laughed and called us a disappointment. After that it was pretty much the new normal, I got used to it. And after a few years… _Maddie left_. I don’t really blame her. I'm glad she got out; I just wish it wasn’t with Doug."

Buck got quiet after that; he closed his eyes as though reliving the memory. Chimney considered holding hand but thought against it.

He didn’t say anything though, waiting for Buck to be ready to keep going.

"The worst came later. _He kicked me out of the house when I was 17_."

Chimney raised an eyebrow, Buck looked like he was in physical pain as he remembered it. He gently placed a hand on Buck's back and was relieved when his friend eased upon the touch.

"Maddie doesn’t know, I never told her. My dad caught me in my room with my friend Justin." Buck whispered. "He caught us _kissing_. That was the worst beating I ever got. I think he literally tried to beat the gay out of me."

Chimney's not ashamed to admit there were tears in his eyes at this point. He knew Buck was bi. He told them once, when the team went drinking after a tough shift. Bobby served as the descanted driver; Buck got really drunk that night. Depressed drunk, it was a few weeks after Abby left. They told him they love him no matter what, that they didn’t care. To be honest Chimney wasn’t sure if Buck even remembered telling them, or if pretended he didn’t. After all it's not like they didn't notice the men around during his Buck 1.0 phase.

Regardless, they never brought it up.

Which was hard given the whole will-they-won't-they-thing going on with Eddie.

"I stayed at my friend's house till' I graduated. His parents were nice enough to let me stay. After that I left for college and never looked back. I only saw my dad twice since then. The last time was at Maddie's wedding."

Buck was also crying now. He wiped his eyes and hiccupped. "And I hate the fact that despite all that… I missed him. That I still love him. And now he's gone and I – I don’t want to be sad about it but I am."

"Oh Buck. It’s okay to miss him. He was your father. It's okay. You can still love him, even if he was a piece of shit."

Buck chuckled at that. "You can say that again." Suddenly, his face went dark. "I just – today with Maddie… god. The way she looked at me. She was scared of me Chim. _I don’t want to become like him_."

Buck whispered that last part. He sounded so _broken_.

"I don't want to be my father."

Chimney patted Buck shoulder again, making him look at him. "You are nothing like him." He said, empathizing every word. If anything, Buck took after Bobby, even if the man wasn't biologically related to him. _Bobby was his father._

"You are not. You are kind and caring and a goddamn hero, _you hear me_?"

Buck looked at him doubtful.

"If I am then why… why didn’t my own father love me?"

Chimney felt chills down his spin. _Shit._ He just wanted to hug Buck and wrap him up in bubble wrap and keep him away from the cruel world.

"Look. It wasn’t your fault. None of it. You hear me? _None of it!_ You were a child; no child should have to go through it. You didn’t deserve it and your father is a fool for not seeing how amazing you are. And despite all the crap you went through you turned out a damn good man. I am lucky to call you my friend Buckaroo."

Buck looked stunned. He blinked a few times, as if stopping himself from crying again.

"Shit man – I – I mean… thanks." he smiled. "You know, I never really had a family until I joined the 118. I'm glad I have you guys. I'm glad Maddie has _you_."

Chimney laughed. He never got tired to hear Buck's seal of approval. "That’s means a lot coming from you."

_"I'm glad you're my friend too Chim."_

**\--**

Things were more light-hearted after that. they shared a few laughs. Buck kept drinking. Chimney stuck to the water knowing he'd need to get Buck's ass home at the end of the night. He got a text from Maddie on his way back from the bathroom, asking how her brother was doing.

_He's doing better. He's going to regret that tequila in the morning though._

Chimney smiled at Maddie's replay.

_He always does. Thanks for taking care of him. You're the best <3_

When he reached Buck at the bar, he was busy staring at his phone. He had a crinkle at his forehead and few more shot glasses next to him than before.

Chimney raised an eyebrow at that. He saw the bartender waving for him to come over.

"Listen man, I'm cutting him off. _Here_ –" He handed Chimney Buck's car keys. "I took it from him when he got here."

"Thanks."

The bartender smiled. "No problem. You should probably head there though. He's starting to get all wishful over some guy. I wouldn’t let him drink and dial."

Chimney laughed and thanked him one more time before joining Buck, who didn’t seem to notice him. And then Chimney saw what he was staring it. It was a photo.

A photo of Eddie and Christopher.

Christopher was eating ice cream and laughing and Eddie wearing a wide smile as he took the selfie. There was a caption attached to the photo.

_Missed you at movie night._

Buck had a look on his face. A look Chimney knew too well. He saw that look before. Whenever Hen showed him pictures of Karen and Denny. Or whenever Bobby watched his lock screen photo (a picture from his and Athena's wedding) hell, Chimney was pretty sure he himself wore that same expression whenever he saw a photo of him and Maddie.

He knew that look.

It was the raw aspect of someone in love.

And damn if he wasn’t proud of how far Buck came since he met him.

"You okay there, Buckaroo?"

" _Yeah… look how cute they are."_ Buck nodded, and with his state of drunkenness his head bobbed up and down, it was almost comical. His eyes were still glued to his phone.

Chimney chucked. "Alright there, buddy. I'm taking you home."

Buck pouted and looked up at him. He was the equivalence of puppy-eyes.

 _Do not look directly at them,_ he told himself. Saying no to him was like kicking a puppy.

"Come on." He helped Buck to his feet. "Come on buddy let's go." He wrapped Buck's hand around his shoulder and dragged him out of the bar.

"You know something man…" Buck blurted out as they reached his car. "I really, really love you. I mean not in the same way as my sister… even though you have a nice butt."

"Gee, thanks." Chimney laughed. He shook his head as Buck tripped on his feet and nearly fall on his ass. "I love you too, Buck."

Keeping Buck standing straight was a challenge, yet somehow, only god knows how, he managed to open the door, tuck Buck into his car and buckle his seatbelt. Once he was behind the wheel and pulled out from the parking-lot he noticed Buck was playing with his phone.

_Oh, no._

"What are you doing there, buddy?"

Buck's head jerked so quickly Chimney was concern he might get whiplashed.

"Nothing…"

"Buck –"

"I wasn't doing anything."

"Buck. Don’t make me pull over and take that phone."

Buck sighed in defat, he dropped his phone on his lap. "I just want to call Eddie. I want to hear his voice… he has a nice voice. He has a nice everything." he had a dreamy smile on his lips. " He's amazing. Don't you think he has the most pretty eyes?"

 _Okay. Buck was officially wasted._ "Yeah Eddie's awesome but I dunno man, I don’t think it's such a good idea to call him right now."

"You're right. He's probably sleeping…"

Chimney blinked. He reflected for a second, highly doubting Eddie was asleep after today. Suddenly a thought accord to him, he smiled to himself before taking the left turn instead of the right.

"Where are we going?" Buck rose in his seat and started out the window. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing, I'm just taking you _home_ Buckaroo."

Buck nodded, too drunk to care or protest that it wasn’t the way to his apartment.

When he pulled into Eddie's driveway ten minutes later Buck was lightly snoring in the passenger seat. He succeeded in pulling him out of the car and hauling him to the porch. Chimney took note of dark house and opted is better to call Eddie instead of knocking. He pushed Buck against the wall and the guy moaned as he swayed on his feet. Chimney kept one hand on Buck's chest as he pulled out his phone.

" _Everything okay chim?"_ Eddie picked up after one ring.

"Yeah, sorry did I wake you?" he asked, even though Eddie didn’t sound sleepy at all.

" _No… why?"_

"I'm outside your house. Can you come to the door?"

There was a long pause before Eddie answered. " _Yeah I'll be right there."_

He heard shuffling inside the house before the door opened, reveling messy hair and worried eyes.

" _Eddie!"_

Buck seemed to have been fully woken up, he lit up like a Christmas tree and practically threw himself into his best friend arms.

"Buck? What – " Eddie nearly got thrown off balance by the sudden force and could only blink in surprise before wrapping his arms around Buck to support him.

He gave Chimney a look over Buck's shoulder.

"Is he drunk?"

"You bet. Wasted to be correct."

Eddie mumbled to himself before going inside, which looked hard considering Buck leached on to him. He signaled chimney to fallow him.

"Help me get him to bed."

Chimney hurried to quietly shut the front door before grabbing ones of Buck's arms before flinging it over his shoulder. It took some joint effort, but eventually they made it to the guest bedroom. And Chimney was impressed by the fact that despite how intoxicated Buck was, he didn't make too much noise, taking Christopher into account. Eddie took the lead once they entered the room. He swiftly stripped Buck from his jacket and nudged him to the bed.

 _"Are you trying to get me naked Diaz? I thought you would at least buy me dinner first…"_ Buck laid back on the bed, biting his lip as he smirked up at Eddie.

" _Dios."_ Eddie shook his head, a small smile on his lips. "Just how much did you drink?"

"Not much..." Eddie gave him a look and Buck let out a dramatic sigh. "Okay fine. A lotttt… M'sorry…" Buck slurred as Eddie took of his shoes and pulled a blanket over him.

Eddie simply looked at him as though he was crazy. "You got nothing to be sorry about." He brushed Buck's hair off his face. He looked hesitant for a split-second before leaning over and planning a kiss to his forehead.

Buck's only reply was the dopey smile on his face.

"You will, however, be sorry for that hangover tomorrow." Eddie teased when he pulled back and Buck groaned before turning over.

Eddie chuckled. "Goodnight man."

"Night…" Buck snored into his pillow.

Once Eddie turned around, he realized Chimney had observed the whole thing.

Chimney simply raised an eyebrow, his face hurting from the wide grin on his face.

"Shut up." Eddie grumbled quietly, his face red.

Chimney put his hands up. "Hey, I didn’t say anything." He whispered as Eddie closed the door

"Right." Eddie rolled his eyes. "How is he?"

"Umm...he'll be alright. We had a talk."

Eddie nodded, moving to the kitchen. Chimney fallowed him. "Do you want something to drink?"

"No thanks. It's pretty late, I should get home; just thought it'll be better to get him here than to his apartment. Beside he said he wanted to call you. Sorry I should have asked –"

"It's fine." Eddie said. "You did the right thing don't worry. Christopher doesn’t have school tomorrow, I'm sure a day with him will do Buck good."

"If that doesn’t than nothing will."

Eddie laughed and then frowned, there was thoughtful crinkle on his forehead. "Did you get here with Buck's car?"

"Ahhh _… crap_." Chimney cursed. "My car's still at the bar."

"Do you want me to –"

"No, it's fine. I'll take an uber and pick it up tomorrow. I'll ask Hen to drop me off in the morning."

He searched through his pocket for a minute before handing Eddie's the car keys.

"Just take care of him, will you?"

Eddie's face softened. "You know I will."

Chimney smiled before pulling him into a hug. "Thanks for bringing him here." He heard Eddie whisper in his ear.

"No problem. Well, better get going then." He pulled back and pointed to the front door. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight Chim." Eddie laughed as he walked him out.

"Oh, and Goodluck in the morning." Chimney twirled on the porch-steps to wink at Eddie. "You'll need it. Your boy is a handful."

He could have sworn he saw Eddie scowl before he shut the door.

While he waited for the uber, he shot Maddie a quick text. 

_Buck's fine. I dropped him off with Eddie. He'll take care of him._

He got the reply once he entered the car.

_That's good, you took him home. Thank you._

Chimney smiled at that; cause isn't it true. If the saying 'home is where the heart is' was anything to go by… than Buck's home was definitely right where he dropped him. With Eddie and Christophe.

His phone buzzed again.

_Now how about you come home?_

Chimney's heart might have exploded right then and there. Moving in with Maddie was probably the best decision he ever made. And if there was one huge thing he had in common with Eddie Diaz, it was how stupidly, irretrievably in love they were with the Buckley siblings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are a lot of headcanons about Buck and Maddie having abusive parents... which I agree with. This is my take on it.


	4. Athena

Athena always prided herself for knowing what to do. No matter the situation. No matter the problem. She knew what to do.

_Today was the exception._

When Buck called her the other day asking her help with buying a gift for Bobby's birthday she was touched. Truly.

That’s how she found herself going shopping with Buck at the mall on her day off.

First, they had lunch at a coffee house nearby. Which gave her the perfect opportunity to ask the burning question.

"How are you holding up?"

Buck gazed up from his plate. "I'm fine."

Athena gave him a sharp look and Buck hurried to stuff his face with food to avoid her eye.

"Buckaroo." She said gently. "Bobby is worried about you and frankly, so am I."

When Bobby told her about it, she was enraged. She had quickly pushed these feelings down, knowing that man didn't deserve the fuss. He didn’t deserve a second thought. All she wanted to do was to hug that sweet boy who had become like family to her.

"I'm fine, really." Buck shrugged.

"I talked to Maddie the other day." Athena sighed and put down her fork and reached out for Buck's hand. "She told me your mother was at the funeral."

Buck froze. "You talked with Maddie?"

"Yeah. We had lunch the other day."

"Did she put you up to this?" Buck narrowed his eyes. "She's been fussing over me all week."

"I understand why." Athena crossed her arms over her chest. "But no, she didn't put me up to this. She didn’t need to. _I care about you,_ Buckaroo. I'm worried."

"I appreciate it, but you don't need to. I'm fi–"

"If you say _'I'm fine_ ' one more time –"

"Okay!" Buck threw his hands up. "I'm not fine. Is that what you want to hear?"

"No." Athena said sadly. "Not at all. I just wish you would talk to someone about this. Doesn’t have to be me. But at least talk to your sister about it. Or _Eddie_."

Buck fidgeted nervously at the mention of Eddie. "I don't want to bother him with this…" he murmured to himself.

"I highly doubt it would be a bother." She pointed out, almost in admonish. "You're his best friend." _And so much more._ "And he cares about you."

Buck let out a sigh. "There isn’t much to talk about anyway." He spoke quietly. "My father is six-feet under, my mom was there which was _fun._ And then someone gave a fake half-assed eulogy. Nothing special."

"And how do you feel about that?"

Buck laughed, half-hearted. "Are you trying to shrink me? And here I thought you were happy being a cop."

Athena simply rolled her eyes at him and Buck laughed again. Only this time, it was real.

"Okay look, yeah it's been a rough week, and I think I'm still trying to wrap my head around everything. And seeing my mom wasn't easy, it never is. She wanted the money, like she always does, so we gave it to her. But…" this time Buck reached out for her hand. "I am fine. Really."

She smiled at him. Her eyes turned glossy as she took him in, feeling pride at the man in front of her. _No matter what horrors life threw at him, he stayed the kind, selfless, caring person he is._

"Besides…" Buck said suddenly. "It's not like I'm used to having parents anyway, so nothing's that different anyway." He shrugged, as if in indifference. But Athena could see the tension in his body at the words, the way his eyes casted in sadness and pain.

Maddie told her about their mother ways. It made her blood boil. As a mother herself she couldn't grasp how that woman didn’t care for her children. Especially given her children were so amazingly wonderful. And hearing Buck speak these words… It broke her heart. She wanted to tell him he did have parents. That he did have a father he truly deserved. And that she cared for him in a way his mother should have.

"Well… you have a family now. We all care about you. Buck." she said instead. "And Maddie too. You'll always have a place with us."

Buck's lips twitched into a smile; his eye twinkled. "I know."

"Good." Athena nodded. "Now, how about we order that cake you've been talking about."

Buck beamed at the offer and signaled to the waiter.

They spent another half an hour at the restaurant, eating the desert and catching up, Buck of course avoided the topic when she tried to bring up Eddie again. Which only earned him a knowing smirk. When it came down to buy the gift Buck opted on the expensive cooking tools to which Athena rolled her eyes. She dragged him away from the store before his wallet began to cry at the purchase.

There were outside another store, one with reasonable prices when it happened.

Looking back, she should have paid more attention. She should have noticed when the commotion started. But she brushed it off to some crazy sale. It wasn’t until the gunshot was fired that she realized what was really going on.

_It was too late._

Before she knew what was happening, Buck pushed her to the ground as anther fire was shot. She scrapped her hand on the floor and hit her head. It took her moment to get up.

She realized two things when she did. One: the gunman was running away. And two: Buck was bleeding on the ground, whimpering as blood poured from his stomach.

Everything was a haze after that. The panic, keeping Buck awake, applying pressure to the wound, calling 911 – It all went by with a blink of an eye. Before she realized she was standing outside next to her coworker, Steve she thinks, as he filled out the report.

But her mind was on Buck, she heard Steve asking her questions, but all she could focus on was the paramedic's rolling Buck into the ambulance. She felt a tug at her heart, a pull asking her to go with him, hold his hand, comfort him.

"Athena." Steve called her name, more loudly then before.

Athena tore her eyes from the ambulance as it pulled away. Steve was looking at her sympathetically. "Look I know it hard, but you know the drill. I need to fill the report if we want to catch him."

Athena nodded. She answered the rest of his questions as fast and efficiently as she could.

"Do you need a ride to the hospital?" Steve asked once they were done.

Athena shook her head. "I'll take a cab; you just focus on catching the bastard."

Steve nodded. "Don't worry we're on it. He's a strong kid, he'll be alright. Make sure to check on that hand though." He said before getting into his car.

Athena blinked and looked down. Aside from Buck's blood all over her clothes, her own arm did seem to bleed a little. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. _He'll be okay._ She told herself. _He's been off the blood thinners for a while, he'll make it. He made it through worse. He's a tough kid. A bullet is not what will take out Even Buckley._

She took a moment to collect herself before starting to move. She took out her phone, ready to call a cab when she froze.

Her body was shaking. She wasn’t sure if it was from noticing the blood on her hands for the first time or the adrenaline finally wearing off. But what made her stomach turn more than anything was her lock screen photo.

_Bobby._

She needs to tell Bobby. How does she tell Bobby?

_How do you call your husband and tell him the boy he loves like a son was shot protecting her?_

_How do you tell your husband your son was shot?_

_Her son…_

For the first time in a long time, Athena didn’t know what to do.

_What is she going to do?_

"Athena?"

Athena felt chills run down her spine She knew that voice, it belonged to her best friend.

"Hen." She called calmly, as calmly as she mastered. She tried to collect herself before facing her before realizing it was pointless. _She was covered in blood for god's sake._

"Oh my god!" Hen eyes widened once she finally turned around to face her. "Athena –"

"It’s not mine." She said to reassure her. "What are you doing here?"

Hen was in her uniform. Which could mean the rest of the team was there. Which could mean her husband was nearby. And she was not ready to face him.

"We were on a call a few blocks from here when we heard what happened, we came to help – wait whose blood is it?"

Athena didn’t answer. Which only freaked Hen out more. "Athena –"

Hen didn’t get a chance to finish because Athena broke into tears and fell into Hen's arms. All she could see was Buck, lying on the ground. All she could feel was his blood pouring into her hands.

"Hen, were did you run off to?"

Athena dimly heard Chimney voice and footsteps coming to them. She couldn’t bring herself to look until she felt familiar hands rubbing her back.

" _Athena?"_

She pulled away from Hen's embrace to see her husband, who's concern only grew once he noted the blood on her clothes.

"What happened?" he asked gently. Too gently. Like he was afraid of her answer. Maybe because deep down, he already knew. "Whose blood is that?"

_She was about to break his heart, she knew it._

Athena braced herself, she took a deep breath. "Buck's. It’s Buck's."

_"What?"_

To her surprise, the broken whisper didn't come from her husband, it came from Eddie.

The man looked like he got the rug pulled from under him. And Athena could understand. She'd probably look the same if it was Bobby, the man she loved _. Instead it was the man Eddie loved._

It was the only explanation to that look on Eddie's face. He loved Buck.

"You were – you were with Buck?" Bobby uttered, stumbling with his words.

Athena nodded weakly. "He wanted my help to buy you a birthday present and then this crazy man run out with a gun…" she was spiraling, she could tell. "I didn't notice. I didn't… Buck pushed me out of the way – "

"Hey, hey, hey!" Bobby called out and grabbed her shoulders. "It wasn’t you're fault alright?" he pulled her into his arms. "Where's Buck now?"

Athena admired the way he managed to stay calm despite the situation.

"They took him to the hospital. I was just about to go there when you showed up."

"And that's what we gonna do." Hen spoke behind her and rubbed her back. "Come on our boy needs us."

While Bobby lead her to the truck, his hand firmly griping the small of her back, she saw Eddie wobble on his feet as he walked besides them. Hen wrapped an arm around his shoulder for support.

"I'll call Maddie." Chimney said shakily as he jumped into the truck, pulling out his phone.

_Maddie._

Athena felt like she'd been burned. She forgot about Maddie. _This day just kept getting worse_.

**\--**

Athena hated waiting rooms. She always had.

The worse part was the waiting, the uncertainly, the dread. She remembered Hen softly pushing her into a chair before doing the same to her husband. She felt as Hen, Chimney and Eddie sat down across from them. She could feel Chimney's foot twitching. No one was talking. But she could sense their eyes on her.

She couldn’t bring herself to look at any of them. Instead she started at her hands. They were covered with blood. Dried up blood. Buck's blood.

God, she just wanted to scream till her lungs gave out. This was like finding May on that bathroom floor all over again.

_This was unfair._

Athena wasn't sure when she began to love Buck as much as her other children, but she did. It was too late to stop it now. Her heart was already breaking.

She could only imagine how her husband must be feelings. He already lost two children… now he was gonna lose another one.

 _Stop it._ She told herself. _Buck will pull through. Buck will be okay. He's going to live._

She heard a small sniff beside her, and her heart broke once more. Subconsciously she reached out her hand and grabbed Bobby's tightly.

 _This is unfair,_ she thought again. _It was cruel._

But she couldn't face him, not yet

.

_"Maddie!"_

Athena wasn’t sure how long they sat there in silence, but when Chimney's voice broke the daze she nearly jumped out of her skin.

She finally dared to look.

Maddie had run into her boyfriend's arms and held him close. He had whispered something to her ear, and she nodded before letting go. Maddie glanced at Eddie for a moment – the boy was unsettled in his seat, eyes puffy and head duked down – before turning to look straight at her.

And when Maddie saw her, a look of horror drew to her face. "Athena. Oh my – "

She stepped closer and kneeled down in front of her.

"It's not mine." Athena whispered and shook her head. "It's not mine." She couldn’t recognize her own voice.

Something in Maddie's face broke as she nodded, her hand slowly rubbed Athena's leg in comfort. "I know. How about we get you cleaned up? I brought you some clothes."

Athena blinked, _she brought her some – god._ She willed herself to stand up, if Maddie can hold it together than so should she.

"Okay." She said and allowed Maddie to drag her away.

_"Here."_

Athena felt something being shoved into her hand and she half registered they were in an empty room now. She comparatively heard Maddie shuffle around, locking the door and closing the blinders.

Athena changed with haste. Once she was in clean clothes she felt as Maddie take her hands and wipe them down with something wet. She felt trembling and It took her a minute to realize it wasn’t Maddie's hands that were shaking, it was her own.

"Athena." Maddie said making her look up. "It wasn’t your fault. No one blames you."

Athena swallowed the lump in her throat. "When I first met your brother, I didn't like him very much." She found herself saying.

Maddie snored. "Yeah he told me. He was terrified of you."

"But now… now I love that boy. _So much_. And I just can't…"

"I know." Maddie nodded and squeezed her hand. "He knows too. He loves you too."

"I should tell him that more."

"And you will." Maddie said, with so much confidence it made her choked up. "My brother had survived our parents, a booming and a truck crushing his fucking leg, a pulmonary embolism and a freaking tsunami… he is not going to be taken down by a gun."

Tears pierced Athena's eyes at the words. "That's what I thought… _god_. When he pulls trough, I will not let him out of my sight for a month!"

Maddie laughed shakily. "I think you will have to get in line with me and Bobby." She pondered for a moment before adding. "Eddie too."

Athena scoffed. "Let them try."

**\--**

It took six more hours before they got any news.

Hen and Chimney had just returned, they went back to the station to help the replacement shift given that Bobby and Eddie were in no shape to do so. Michael had the kids, and she had to argue with Harry and May on the phone because they insisted to come to the hospital to see Buck.

 _Something inside her unraveled when Harry referred to Buck as his brother._ And it took everything she had to say they'll have to wait till morning.

Everything was taken care of. Karen was at Hen's side now – Carla had generously offered to watch over Denny and Christopher for the night while they waited, asking to fill her in the moment they heard something.

Athena couldn’t take it anymore. She felt like she hadn't moved for hours. She was so anxious she practically vibrated in her seat. _Why was it taking so long? What if something went wrong? God what if –_

"Family of Evan Buckley?"

Her head snapped up quicker than humanly possible. A doctor stood by the doorway; his face indecipherable.

Maddie leaped out of her seat and they all fallowed suit.

"That's us."

The doctor raised an eyebrow at that.

"I'm his sister." Maddie said, she brought a hand to her mouth. "How is he? Is he okay?"

"It was a touch and go for a while. Your brother lost a lot of blood." The doctor started. "He flatlined twice. Once in the ambulance and once on the table, we were able to resuscitate him. The bullet sifted to his kidney which caused some compactions during surgery. But we managed to save his kidney. The surgery was a success. He's very lucky. He's one hell of a fighter." The doctor smiled.

Maddie let out a shaky breath. "He's okay?" she croaked, trembling.

"He's okay." The doctor nodded. "He's being put into recovery as we speak. A nurse will come to show you to his room in a few minutes. It might be a while before he wakes up." With that he left, and Maddie slowly turned to face them.

"He's okay." She mumbled in joy.

_He's okay._

These two words allowed her heart to beat again. It let her breath again. _Her son is okay. He's okay._

Athena grinned. "Of-course he is. He's too stubborn not to be." She took the two steps to Maddie and pulled her into her arms.

She saw Hen and Karen embrace and Chimney clap Eddie on the shoulder, Eddie looked like he can finally breath again as he sank into his chair, his face buried in his hands.

Bobby however, remined frozen in chair, staring blankly at the wall. She let go of Maddie and walked to her husband warily.

_"Honey?"_

Bobby didn’t move.

"Honey." She tried again, she crouched in front of him and grasped his hands. "Buck's okay. He's alive."

Bobby still stared at something over her shoulder, she used one of her hands to cup his cheek and force him to look her in eye. "Did you hear me?"

He nodded, tears streaming from his eyes.

"He's okay." She said again.

Bobby let out a sob and melted into her touch. She knew what was going through his head. He couldn’t believe it, he was fearing the worst, fearing of going through the worst again. He was expecting to lose another child.

" _I didn’t lose him…"_

"Oh honey." She drew him into her arms and stroked his hair as he silently weeped into her chest.

It was like everything Bobby pushed down since the truck, and the party and the tsunami… it all just came bubbling out. After all these times Buck nearly lost his life and Bobby played the part and acted as the sounding board for the rest of them… he finally broke down from the weight of it all. 

She felt the others clearing out of the room, giving them space. And she stayed like that, consoling her wrecked husband until he calmed down, whispering soft reassurances to him.

The minutes dragged out for what felt like hours, eventually Bobby's breathing became steady again.

She pulled back. "You're better now?"

Bobby nodded; he wiped his face with his sleeve.

"Come on." She told him once he finally stood up, "Let's go see _our_ son."

But Bobby didn’t budge.

"Bobby what– " her voice died in her throat when she saw why.

 _Eddie._ He was still in the room, glued to his chair with his face still in his hands, his body was shaking.

"Go." Athena told Bobby. _Go, I got this. Go take care of Buck._

Bobby reluctantly agreed, he kissed her cheek, fingers brushing against hers before walking away.

"Eddie." Athena started softly, sitting down next to the man. "Look at me." She gently moved his hand to reveal his face.

His eyes were red, fresh tears still shinning down his cheeks. He seemed… lost.

"I can't lose him." He whispered; voice hoarse. "I can't lose him Athena."

She cupped his jaw, making him look her in the eye. "I know sweetie. But you didn’t lose him. He's okay. He's alive."

Eddie's lip trembled; a small sob escaped. "I can't – all I could think the last few hours was how… how am I gonna tell Chris? It was like Shannon all over again. And he loves Buck so much. How was I going to tell him he's gone too? How am I going to – I can't lose him."

"You don't need to do that because he's okay." Athena said, her thumb brushed the tear off his cheek. "He's not going anywhere. He's okay."

"I know. I know that now. My brain hadn’t caught up yet." Eddie closed his eyes. "It's just, the thought of him dyi– I'm sorry I know I'm being stupid…"

Athena shook her head firmly. "You're not. It’s understandable. I know how _close_ you two are. I know how _much_ he means to you. "

Eddie's eyes darted nervously, and Athena raised an eyebrow.

"I – " Eddie gulped, as if contemplating if he should try and deny it. "You know?"

Athena laughed and the action made her dizzy, she hadn’t laughed in what felt like days. " Of course. I am not blind Diaz." She gave him a pointed look.

Eddie looked frighten, like he was about to bolt at any moment. He opened his mouth to protest but she shook her head.

"It's okay. You don't need to talk about it. Come on, let's go."

She pulled Eddie up, tagging his hand until he rose to his feet. He shambled a little behind her but trailed after her. There wasn't much space left in Buck's room. Chimney, Karen and Hen took different sides leaning on the wall. Maddie was sitting to Buck's left, holding his hand and Bobby stood beside her, gripping onto Buck's leg as if he's afraid the boy will disappear if he lets him out of sight.

Athena urged Eddie to the empty chair on Buck's right. Purposely left empty.

Eddie hesitated, like he still couldn’t believe it, and Athena had to physically push him. It took him a minute before he gave in and took a hold of buck's hand.

Nobody said anything for a while. The tension from the waiting room had worn off, instead the room was filled with anticipation.

They just waited for Buck to wake up.

**\--**

Athena didn’t realize how late it was until she was stirred awake by her phone buzzing. She rubbed her eyes and scanned the room. At one point the nurses brought more chairs into the room and everyone seemed to be asleep now. She glanced to Buck; he was still lying motionless on the bed.

She checked the caller ID before steeping outside to the hall to answer. It was her Captain.

_"Athena, I heard Buck made it out of surgery."_

_"_ He did. You're still at the station?" her gaze trailed to the clock on the wall, it was way past midnight.

_"I just wrapped things up. I was glad to hear he's okay. And you'd be glad to hear we caught the man who did it."_

She was glad. She was also livid at the thought of it. "Good. I hope he rots."

_"Don't worry the district attorney is on it. Turns out the gunman's wife cheated on him with the owner of one of the stores. That's why he went there…"_

Athena's blood boiled – _that's the reason her son was lying in the hospital? "_ "Did he kill him?"

_"Unfortunately. The paramedics couldn’t save him. But we'll make sure he gets the maximum sentence, for hurting your boy too."_

"That's good. I'm glad he's off the streets."

" _Well I'll let you get back then I Just wanted to update you. Oh, and Athena?"_

 _"_ Yeah?"

_"Don’t worry about coming in tomorrow I already got Jensen to cover your shift."_

Athena smiled, she forgot about work tomorrow due to everything. "Thank you."

_"No problem. Just take care of your family. Goodnight Athena."_

"You too." Athena said before hanging up, she took a deep breath. The fact the man was behind bars helped calm her nerves. Didn't do much for her rage.

She gazed up to force the sting in her eye to go away. She couldn’t help to feel gratitude for everything that she had. For the family she still had.

_For that boy on that bed being alive._

She gave herself a minute to pull herself together. When she walked back into the room she was surprisingly met with Buck's smiling face.

_"You're awake!"_

Buck chuckled, cringing in pain a little at the action. He raised his hand to shush her, gesturing to the others.

"Right." She whispered and came closer to him, she sat down on the edge of the bed. "How are you feeling?"

She didn’t like the playful glint in his eyes.

"Like I've been shot…"

Athena squint her eyes. "Don't." she warned, she scolded herself for the tip of her lip twitching.

"Too soon?" Buck asked, flashing her a toothy grin. "Okay, I'm sorry you're right. Shouldn’t joke about that." he added upon seeing her expression.

_He always uses jokes and teasing to ease the pain and trauma. He's been doing it since she met him._

She sighed. "You really scared us there, kid."

Buck swallowed, glancing between Maddie, Eddie and Bobby. The three were the closest to him. Maddie was crawled up in ball with a blanket over her. Bobby was seated by his feet, head draped backwards uncomfortably. And Eddie was stiff in his chair; his hand laid loosely on the bed evidencing he fell asleep still holding Buck's hand. His eyes also darted to Chimney. Hen and Karen huddled in the corner of the room. Guilt flashed across his face.

"I know. I'm sorry."

"Stop that." Athena shook her head. "You got shot. It was in no way your fault. Just, don’t ever do that again. _Please._ "

_Don’t ever get hurt trying to protect me again._

"Okay, _mom."_

He clearly meant that in a joke, but Buck froze once he realized what he said. He paled; his eyes widened as he looked at her terrified.

And Athena, she felt like her heart grew three sizes. _Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Do not cry! He'll never let you live it down._

"I'm sorry It's the painkillers –"

"I love you, Buckaroo." She said mainly to shut him up, but also because she promised Maddie, and herself. "I'm glad you're alright but one of these days… you will give me a heart attack if you don’t stop ending up in this hospital bed." She noted and leaned over to cup his cheek.

Buck melted into her touch. "Not the first time I heard it."

"Oh, I am sure you'll hear more of that in a few hours. When my husband wakes up he will have a whole speech prepared. Your sister too."

Buck fidget with his hands on his lap. He opened his mouth to respond when they heard Eddie groan. Athena turned to the noise; Eddie stirred in his chair, he moaned as he moved to the side but did not wake up.

Buck had a weird expression on his face as he watched his best-friend. One that quickly dissolved into a soft, tender loving gaze.

Athena smiled at him knowingly.

She knew Buck loved Eddie. And after today she was sure Eddie loved him too. It only took her one launch at the station to notice the thing between them. _She had eyes;_ it wasn’t too hard. The secret looks, the subtle touches and the lack of personal space… it was pretty damn obvious.

Over time she wondered if they'll ever do anything about it. She thought it was a waste for them to not just… be together. With the lives they've led, their jobs, there was no time to waste. Every day was a blessing. A part of her wanted to just grab them, shove them in a room, scream 'you love each other you idiots' and lock the door behind her.

She knew better.

It wouldn’t be right. And it wouldn’t be fair. They needed to figure things out on their own, get together on their own. The voice in her head told her to butt out.

" _You know_ , he really cares about you. You should have seen him earlier."

_Then again, a little nudge wouldn’t hurt._

"What?"

Buck head snapped like he got caught red-handed. His face flushed. "What do you mean."

Athena arched an eyebrow. "You know very well what I mean. Eddie cares about you. A lot more than you think."

Buck was perplexed. He sighed, ran a hand through his hair and straighten up in his position on the bed. "I lo–I care about him. So much. I know he cares about me too." He finally settled on what to say and fiercely avoided her eye.

"But he's doesn't feel the – It's not in the way you think."

Athena wanted to roll her eyes but elected not to. _Now was not the time to hash it out._ She bit down her lip to stop a snarky comment from escaping, something along the lines of _'stop being a damn idiot that man adores you'._

Buck must have noticed because he sighed again. "He doesn’t!" and she wasn't sure who he tried to convince more, her or himself.

"Uh huh." Athena let out a laugh. "Whatever you say. Go back to sleep, Buckaroo. You need the rest." She leaned in, kissing his forehead. Her hand stroked his hair as she hummed softly. Like she would do to Harry and May when she tucked them in at night.

And uncharacteristically Buck didn’t argue like he usually would. He huffed out in annoyance but relaxed back down into the bed.

Athena watched as he closed his eyes and eased by her touch. She continued to stroke his hair until his breathing slowed down and his body stilled.

She heard the faint whisper before he fell asleep. " _I love you too, mom."_

_That boy will be the death of her._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took a while to post because I had to do some last minute editing... Also I'm still working out the next chapter e  
> While working on another sorry on the side. I loved writing this chapter though. I really love the whole Buck & Athena dynamic, and wish they would do more of them bonding on the show. Oh and sorry for the angst, I had to threw it in.


	5. Bobby

In the end, Buck returned to active duty _before_ Bobby even had his birthday party. It's been about a month and a half since Buck got shot, and two weeks since Bobby's actual birthday.

Despite his protests Athena insisted they have a big diner to celebrate. And due to Buck getting shot it had to be postponed. Buck who was bound to bed rest at the time told them to just have the dinner without him. To which Athena gave him a look so stern it could make the devil squirm.

_"Don’t even think about finishing that sentence Buckley. We will wait till you are all healed up and that is final."_

Due to their crazy schedules it kept getting put off until they finally found the perfect slot on one Saturday night, which will be in a few days. And Bobby figured that the only good thing about being forced to celebrate his birthday was that he'll get to spend it with the people he loved.

His heart still ached at the thought of his late wife and children. It always would. But he knew now that he had to live on without them, make them proud in whatever way he could. He knew they would want him to be happy.

And for the past three years… he was.

After the fire he never thought he would fall in love again or have _children_ again… he never planned to let anyone close to his heart again, he planned to pay his dues before meeting his family again. He didn’t think he could handle another loss. And yet, when he saw Chimney in that car... he realized he failed that mission. Miserably. He opened his heart to his team, and they barged in, knocking down every single wall he so carefully built. He opened his heart to the idea of falling in love again and ended up marrying one of the most amazing women he ever met and becoming a stepfather to two brilliant kids. They all allowed him to feel the joy he thought he no longer deserved. The amount of love he felt for each and every one of them… it took his breath away.

_It made him want to live again._

And he knew that it meant opening himself up for the possibility of pain. He excepted that fact a long time ago… but it didn’t stop him from stressing out on Buck's first day back on the field.

As much as he wanted to wrap the boy up in bubble wrap and keep him tucked away and safe, he knew he had to push through it. He couldn’t make the same mistake again, the one that drove Buck to file the lawsuit in the first place. He couldn’t treat him with kid gloves just because _he_ didn’t want to see him get hurt. He had to let him live his life and do the job he was so damn good at.

His fears drove Buck away, it's what nearly tore their family apart. But just because he wasn't going to rehearse the past didn’t mean he didn’t worry.

It wasn’t a big fire. One of the tenants at the apartment building left her curling iron on when she left for work. It was true luck one of the neighbors noticed before it got out of hand and called 911. The fire contained only to one floor and they got it under control in less than an hour. The only medical emergency needed so far was treatment for some minor smoke inhalation.

But during that minute when Buck didn’t answer his radio, and in fact turned it off because he ran back in head on after hearing barking in a burning apartment despite Bobby's order to evacuate.… Bobby forgot how to breath. And apparently, he didn’t need to reprimand Buck because Eddie seemed to be handling it all on his own. At least that what it looked like when he spotted them and began to march towards them.

"What were you thinking? Jumping in there and turning off your radio –"

"What was I supposed to do Eddie? just leave the dog to burn? You know I can't do tha – God would you guys stop that? I'm fine!"

Buck was sitting on the back of the the aid-car, he was shrugging off his helmet and coat and from the looks of it, he had ash smeared all over his face. Hen and Chimney were half trying to convince half trying to force him to take the oxygen mask. Eddie was glaring at Buck with such fury, as if considering the best way to kill his best-friend and still keep him alive, before snatching the mask and practically jabbing it at Buck's face.

"Dude!" Buck yelled and pushed it aside. "I'm fine!" and as if even his own body wanted to prove him wrong, he fell into a fit of coughing as soon as the words left his mouth.

"Buck, I swear if you don-"

" _Buckley!_ " Bobby cried out as he finally reached them. "You better have that mask on in the next five seconds!"

Buck looked betrayed as he stared at him. He seemed like he wanted to argue, he even opened his mouth to do so when Eddie clutched his arm lightly. The sudden movement wasn’t stubble at all, Eddie was simply gazing at him with pleading eyes… but it was all that was needed to get Buck to yield and buckle.

"I swear, sometimes you guys are worse than Maddie." Buck mumbled under his breath and finally took the oxygen mask from Eddie, unwillingly bringing it to his mouth. Making sure they see how opposed he was to them 'babying' him, as he so put it, murmuring to himself through the mask.

"Oh please." Hen scoffed, her fingers still tracing over him for any sign of injures. "If Maddie was here you wouldn’t even have the chance to speak before she'd strap this on you and drive you to the hospital herself."

"Yeah just be thankful Cap hadn’t called Athena over to do it. Cause she'd probably cuff you to the hospital bed as well." Chimney quipped next to her, pointing with his thumb to the officers still questioning the tenants not far away, Athena visibly strolling amongst them.

 _Bobby noted_ t _o himself to use that threat next time._ His wife had gone into full mama-bear mode over Buck ever since he was shot (to be honest, they all grown more protective over Buck after the incident) and even Buck wasn't stupid enough to go against Athena.

"If I were you, I'd start using that thing." Bobby motioned to him firmly. "'I'm not above doing that."

Buck gave them all a dark look but began taking in deep breathes, and his whole body seemed to relax at the action.

Eddie, on his part, wasn’t amused at all. He placed a hand on Buck shoulder, hovering over him as if to make sure he wasn’t hiding any other injures from them. _"Dios, eres un idiota! Te das cuenta de lo increíblemente estúpido que fue –"_

"Woah!" Buck took off the mask and glared at Eddie. "What are you calling me an idiot for? _Usted habría hecho lo mismo!"_

_"No sin respaldo! No habría apagado mi radio!"_

_"_ _Bien. Te daré eso. ¡Pero aún así hice lo correcto! y tú lo sabes!"_

Bobby blinked in surprise. _Since when does Buck speak Spanish?_ And it wasn’t that he just spoke it, he also barely had any accent at all. It appeared he wasn't the only one taken at back by this. If the way Hen and Chimney gaped at Buck was any indication.

"Woah dude you speak Spanish? Since when?" Chimney asked Buck sounding impressed; his comment effectively shutting down any farther bickering between Buck and Eddie as they both jumped at his voice. Clearly, they forgot they weren't alone.

"Since high-school." Eddie answered, noticing Buck was about to reply and shoved the mask back to his face. Buck didn’t even try to fight it this time as he rasped in shallow breathes while rolling his eyes.

Bobby didn’t miss the not-so-secret look Chimney and Hen gave each other over the new information. That look usually meant the pair was up to no good, he witnessed it enough times to know. He let out a deep sigh and stepped in before they could use it to tease Buck relentlessly.

"Are you okay, kiddo?"

Buck nodded and Bobby furrowed his brows, observing him carefully. He knew very well the kid had a trancey to cover up his pain to not make them worry. And once he was positive there were no other apparent injuries he continued.

"Good. But next time you turn off your radio we will have a very different conversation in my office. _Are we clear_?"

"Yes Cap." Buck took off the mask and nodded, ducking his head down in slight shame.

Bobby felt bad for his harsh voice, but he needed to make point clear. He placed a gentle hand on Buck's shoulder, making him glance up. "You did good, just don't do that again. Not without backup, okay?"

But Buck wasn’t listening to him anymore, he was too busy staring at something behind them with a dropped jaw. He slowly slipped off the aid-car and stood up, the mask dropping to the floor with a thud.

"Hey." Eddie called out before Boddy could, reaching out to grab Buck's arm. "Are you ok–"

_"Buck?"_

That voice. Bobby recognized that voice.

He turned around to the woman behind them. She hadn’t changed much. She still had her signature glasses and a smile that could lit up a room. And that amazing hair of hers… she still had that too. But she also much more content that Bobby had ever saw her be. Bobby could only partially hear Hen and Chimney gasp loudly, far too shocked himself.

His eyebrows rose in wonder, _when did she get back?_

" _Abby!"_ Buck breathed out; voice raising freakishly high at the sight of his ex-girlfriend out of the blue. He began to pant as if he just finished a marathon, gawking in complete awe.

Abby smiled fondly at Buck, taking a timid step closer. "Hi. Long time no see, huh?"

"Yeah." Buck nodded in astonishment, trading towards her as if on reflex. "Huh… so how have you been?" he managed to rasp out. He looked _dazed._ And Bobby worried that perhaps he didn’t take enough oxygen from the mask to handle this.

"I've been good." Abby said, she looked a bit hesitant before she leaped forwards some more and drew Buck in for a hug. "It's so good to see you, I missed you so much."

Buck stiffed for a moment before hugging her back. "I missed you too." He admitted quietly, burying his face in her hair.

"Well, this is awkward…" Chimney whispered, loud enough for Bobby and Hen to hear. When he turned to him, he fallowed his gaze to see what he was looking at. _Eddie._

Eddie looked like he wanted to punch something, scream and run away at the same time. It didn’t take a genius to realize he was jealous. But at least it was subtle to the foreign eye. Bobby took note to the way his jaw clenched, and his fists held tightly by his sides. But it wasn’t anger in his eyes as he watched his best friend reunite with his ex, it was sadness.

Bobby knew Eddie heard all about Abby, all about how much Buck loved her and how she unintentionally broke his heart. The fatherly part of him wanted to go to Eddie and assure him these feelings were long gone. That they have been for a while, and just how blind Eddie was to not notice to _where to_ they have shifted exactly… but Bobby's curiosity got the better of him and he brought his focus back to Buck and Abby. They weren’t hugging anymore, instead they were standing close and in mid conversation. 

"– and I wanted gonna call you when I got back to LA, but my phone fell into a lake in Finland a while back and I didn’t have your number anymore."

"Oh." Buck was still staring at her in awe. "How long have you been back?"

Abby shifted on her feet, tilting her head down with her eyes fixated on the ground. "A few weeks."

" _A few weeks?"_ Buck repeated in surprise, and what Bobby suspected, a little hurt. "And you didn't…" Buck's mouth snapped shut, unable to finish the question.

"Reach out?" Abby guessed with a shake of a head. She had a look in her eyes, a look that look a lot like regret. "I wanted to but… to be honest I wasn’t sure if it was a good idea."

"Why?" Buck blinked confused, folding his arms over his chest. "Why would you think – wait, did you – did you think I'll be mad at you?"

Abby looked up puzzled, her brow arched. "Aren't you? I mean I wouldn’t blame you. I didn’t exactly handle the whole… us that well at the end."

"Abby, I'm not mad at you. I mean I was for a while. But not anymore." Buck shook his head, shooting her a bright smile. "God I was never… I understood why you needed to – I was just glad you were happy. You are, right?"

Abby beamed, her lips twitching into a grin. "Yeah I am. You?"

Buck nodded immediately, his eyes darting to Eddie's direction for a second. "Absolutely."

"I see you still run headfirst into danger." Abby chuckled and gestured to his face. And Buck laughed, his hand subconsciously reaching up to touch his dirty cheek. "Same as always."

"Yeah. I guess somethings never change, huh? Wait –" Buck paused as if realizing something important, sounding suddenly concerned. "What are you doing _here_?" he pointed to their surrounding; the parking lot was still filled with the evacuated tenants.

"I live here."

"What?" Buck exclaimed, he moved as if to get closer to her. "Are you –"

"I'm fine." Abby rolled her eyes somewhat fondly. "The fire wasn’t even on my floor, Buck."

" _Oh,_ that's good –"

_"Buckley!"_

Everyone jumped at the sharp yell, turning to see Athena standing a few feet away with her hands on her hips. Her glare darted from Buck's face to Abby, and her eyes squinted with recognition. Bobby had to hand it to her for holding in her displeasure upon seeing Abby. Her anxiousness over Buck however… _was clear as day._ Bobby noticed the woman behind his wife, holding tightly into her ash-covered golden retriever. Obviously, Athena had just received the full detailed report on Buck's action on the call. And she didn’t look pleased, not in the slightest.

"You better go." Chimney piped up, in slight fear.

Hen nodded next to him "I'd run." She advised.

Buck sent Abby an apologetic look and she simply shook her head in understanding.

"Go." Abby told him, urging him. She shuffled uncomfortably under Athena's steely gaze herself.

Buck ran off, coming to a stop in front of Athena, who wasted no time giving him an earful of her discontent. Bobby was pretty sure he saw her poking him in the chest with her finger before Eddie moved into the line of sight.

"I better go save him before she kills him…" Eddie sighed as he walked towards them.

And once Eddie was off, Bobby didn’t miss the way Abby followed him with her eyes, a pensive crinkle on her face. She watched as Eddie halted next to Buck and began to speak calmly to Athena. And Bobby wondered how long it will take before Eddie switches sides and joins Athena on rebuking Buck, deep down he knew it will happen as soon as Buck opens his mouth.

"So…" Abby started once she finally turned back to face them with her arms lazily crossed over her chest, she seemed _, nervous_. "I guess you guys must hate me."

Bobby raised an eyebrow. _Is that what she thought?_ Sure, he wasn’t _pleased_ with the way she handled things, the way she broke Buck's heart… but he didn’t hate her. He always liked her, he thought she was good for Buck at the time. And clearly their relationship was an essential milestone to him becoming the man he is today. The man he always wanted to be. And before Eddie showed up, Bobby believed she could maybe be the perfect match for Buck.

"No." Hen spoke first with a firm shake of the head. "No, no, we don't hate you."

"Hate is a s _trong_ word." Chimney hurried to say, also shaking his head.

"You did what you needed to do at the time." Bobby added with a shrug.

Abby bit her lip and nodded. "Okay. It just – I know I could have done things differently and I'll always regret not doing so. I want you to know I never wanted to hurt him."

"We know." Bobby assured her.

"Okay." Abby laughed and rubbed her face as if to shake away the tension. "Okay so…" her eyes traveled back to Buck – who at that point was wrapped by Athena's hands as she cheeked him over – before looking at him again. "How long have Buck and Eddie been together? They look like they're one foot away from the aisle already…"

They started at her dumbstruck. _How in the hell does Abby know who Eddie is?_

"What?" it took Bobby a moment to realize it was his own voice asking the question.

"Um…" Chimney hummed, still stunned. "Buck and Eddie are not together."

Abby's head jerked from them to the pair in question and back again, her eyes wide. " _What?"_ she shook her head in disbelief.

"But they're acting like…"

" _We know."_

"And they look like –"

" _We know."_

"And Eddie was just totally jeal–"

"Trust us, we know." Hen suppressed her surprised laughter. "We've been watching them for two years now."

Abby's eyes budged a little. "Two years?!"

"Yep. And it's been _so_ much _fun."_ Chimney said sarcastically.

"Yeah as fun as watching a train wreck." Hen murmured under her breath.

"You don't seem that surprised about them –" Bobby finally regained his voice again and gestured to Buck and Eddie's direction before looking at Abby. "–At all." He remarked.

Abby smiled knowingly. "Back when Buck and I were still in touch… he mentioned Eddie, a lot. A lot more than he likes to admit. It wasn’t too hard to connect the dots on that one."

"I see." Bobby mused. _It made sense._

"And from what Buck told me about him, and the _way_ he talked about him and his son… it was pretty easy to tell he was crushing on Eddie and I assumed after we broke up that they started dating. I mean I know Buck also likes man, so I didn’t think it was that much of a stretch." Abby said with a shrug.

Before Bobby could say anything, Chimney had dabbled over with roaring laughter, holding onto his stomach for support. Hen gave him an unimpressed glare while clearly very amused herself. "You won't be the only one to make that assumption." She told Abby with a smirk.

"Definitely not." Bobby found himself laughing too. "The only ones who _don’t_ see it are these two."

" _Oh._ Well Buck was always a bit too clueless for his own good. _"_ Abby noted in a fond voice.

Bobby let out another laugh at the statement, he glanced at the boy he loved like a son again. By that point Buck was tackled to the ground, happily getting slobbered all over by the dog while Athena attempted to resist her smile and Eddie looked at him in adoration.

"Yeah… But we love him anyway."

**\--**

Bobby hated nights like this. Nights during a 24-hour shift where the insomnia came to visit were never fun. He shifted on the couch, trying to find a more comfortable position and glanced at the cloak at his desk. 5:30 AM.

He let out a sigh before completely giving up on the idea of sleep, stretching out his limb muscles he lazily moved to a sitting position. He let his hand run over his face, rubbing his eyes before finally standing up and exiting his office.

The events of their earlier call that day kept racing through his mind, the sound of Buck turning off his radio and Eddie desperately calling out his name hunted him. Quickly followed by the sight of Buck coughing out blood before collapsing in front of him, which were joined in no time with the image of the boy crushed under the ladder truck, and him lying unconscious at the hospital bed not that long ago.

Logically, he knew it wasn’t even near their most dangerous call, hell it wasn’t even the closet Buck came facing death. But his heart seemed to be thinking otherwise. And honestly, he wasn’t sure how many more times his sanity could survive seeing that boy in danger.

His feet towed across the floor as he dragged himself into the kitchen, only to be greeted by the sight of Buck hovering over the stove and the smell of eggs and pancakes filling the air.

"Hey." Buck said once he noticed him, sparing him a glance over his shoulder. "Couldn’t sleep Cap?"

"Neither could you it seems." Bobby stepped closer, coming to a halt beside him. "Need help?"

Buck studied his face for a minute before shrugging. "I'm almost done but sure."

Bobby hummed and rolled up his sleeves before accepting the pancake batter Buck passed him. They worked in silence for the next few minutes, with Buck turning off the stove and putting the lid over the eggs pan and Bobby flipping the last of the pancakes into the plate before Buck cleared his throat.

"I made some fresh coffee earlier… you want some?"

Bobby raised his eyebrow. "You're not gonna eat?"

He knew Buck tended to neglect taking care of himself sometimes, especially after being injured. They all noticed the slight weight loss after he'd been shot, just the same as after his leg and the tsunami. And Bobby knew he'd be kicking himself for a long time for the way he treated Buck after the lawsuit. How badly he neglected to notice Buck's suffering because of his own damn ego.

Buck rolled his eyes, clearly aware of why Bobby was asking. "I'll wait till the others wake up. Besides, I'm not that hungry right now."

"Yeah I know what you mean. I'd love some coffee." Bobby watched as Buck nodded and moved to the cabinet to pull out the mugs. He grabbed a stack of plates and the pancakes and placed them on the table, eyes still trained to Buck's back as he took a seat.

Buck joined him by the table a second later, silently handing him a steaming mug. He rounded the table and pulled back the chair across from Bobby, the sound of it scraping against the floor echoed in the dead silence.

"So…" Buck started after taking a long sip and humming in satisfaction. "How long do you think it'll be before the others wake up and Chim comes storming in like a vulturer?"

Bobby stuffed back a laugh and raised his mug to his lips. "I'd give it ten minutes."

Buck shook his head. "I dunno Cap…" he said amused. "I think you have too much faith in them, I was gonna go for five, _max_."

"Well, maybe you just have t _oo little_ faith in them. Let's just hope it'll happened before we get the next call."

Buck scoffed and they slipped into a comfortable silence, drinking their coffee as the lazy morning haze creeped through the windows. Bobby contemplated on whether he should say something when Buck beat him to it.

"Hey listen… I'm sorry."

Bobby blinked, his hand paused mid-air. "Sorry? For what?" he asked carefully, settling his mug back to the table."

"For that call earlier." Buck said, his hand nervously brushing on the back of his neck. "I shouldn’t have turned off my radio like that. But I couldn’t just let… I know you were worried. I didn’t mean to worry you. I'm sorry."

"Buck." Bobby sighed. "You don't need to –"

"I wasn’t just being reckless." Buck cut him off, voice growing more and more fidgety with each word. "I swear. I wasn’t trying to play the hero or put anyone in danger or anything like that. I was just –"

"Buck!" Bobby called out, causing Buck to stop his rambling and look up at him with a look Bobby could now place as _fear._ And Bobby mentally cursed the man he knew was the reason behind it. A few months ago, he wouldn’t be able to recognize the meaning under the behavior, now that he could his heart broke, every damn time. "What is this really about?"

"Wh–what do you mean?"

Bobby gave him a pointed look. "This is more than just about that call, Buck."

Buck let out a deep breath, his head sank down as he played with the hands folded on his lap. "It's just…." His voice died in his throat and he sighed. "I don’t…"

"Yeah?" Bobby prompted patiently, making sure to keep his voice calm and encouraging as possible.

 _"I don’t want you to think I'm not ready to be back again."_ And Buck looked damn near _ashamed_ as the words left his mouth, voice lowered to a scared whisper.

Bobby stilled. He stared at Buck and felt the guilt bubbling up slowly. _He should have known this is what this all had been about._ God, he wanted to slam his head against the table, t _his is on him. He's the reason Buck is feeling this way, for god knows how long now._

"Buck, that's not what – if anyone should be sorry it's me."

Buck's head snapped up; eyes widen in surprise. "What?"

"If there's anyone at this table who owes anyone an apology, it me."

"Bobby –"

Bobby raised his hand, singling him he wasn’t finished, and Buck stayed quite allowing him to continue. "I know we moved past the lawsuit, but I realize now I never actually apologized to you like you deserve. And for that I am truly sorry. And I am sorry for what I did. It was not my place to stop you from going back to work. I let _my_ emotions get the better of me. I let it cloud _my_ judgment to a point you felt the only option you had was to sue. And that's on _me."_

Buck gaped at him, mouth dropping to an 'o' in shock. As if he never in a million years expected someone will say these words to him, or think he deserve them. And it only made Bobby want to kick himself ever harder for not understanding sooner how much he hurt that boy sitting in front of him.

"And I am sorry for everything that happened after, and for everything it did to you and Eddie –"

"Hey whoa," Buck interjected, seeming to finally find his voice again. "What happened with Eddie isn’t on you."

Bobby tilted his head, looking at him sadly. "But it is Buck. If I hadn’t pushed you to sue…" he let the rest of the sentence fade in the air, knowing Buck didn’t need a reminder of how bad things turned out.

"Why did you?" Buck gulped nervously, as if afraid he wasn’t allowed to ask. "Why didn’t you think I was ready?"

Bobby sighed. "I was afraid you'd get hurt. _Again."_

"Because you thought I was weak?" Buck said bitterly and his head ducked in shame. "You thought I –"

"No." Bobby said and shook his head. "No, I didn’t think _you_ were weak."

Buck's confused eyes met his and Bobby let out a shaky breath. "I didn’t want you to get hurt again because I knew _I_ was weak."

"Bobby…" Buck started awestruck at the confession and Bobby felt as his eyes turned glossy.

"I didn't think _you_ weren’t ready Buck, I thought _I_ wasn’t. But that was my problem, not yours."

Buck moved so quickly that before he realized what was happening, he was pulled up to his feet and enveloped in a hug. The loud noise of Buck's chair screeching ringed in his ears as he wrapped his arms around Buck, holding him just as tightly.

"Thank you." Buck muttered into his shoulder. "I don’t think I realized how much I needed to hear it until you said it." He admitted as he pulled back, tugging his sleeve over his wet eyes.

Bobby the tension in his shoulder easing a bit and he smiled. "I should have done it a lot sooner." He kept his hand clasped on Buck's shoulder. "I'm sorry."

"I think I had enough apologies for one day Cap." Buck chuckled, his eyes sparkling with content.

Bobby dropped his hand and laughed. "Me too kiddo."

"How about we just put this whole thing behind us for good –" Buck pulled away and took a seat, this time next to Bobby, gesturing for him to sit down as well, "–and just talk about something else?"

Bobby could feel his affection for the boy growing as he took in the serious look on his face. He shoved his chair a little before leaning back against the table so he could see Buck's face. "Okay. Are you planning to see Abby again?"

Buck, who had just propped himself over the table to reach for his mug froze, eyes bulging a bit at the question.

"Should have known you'd ask that." Buck murmured before finally grabbing the mug and reclining back in his chair. "Maybe we should just go back to apologizing… Is it too late to do that?"

"Buck…"

"Okay, okay." Buck raised his hands in surrender. "I… yeah I think so. I mean she gave me her new number and she asked if I'd like to meet up for coffee sometime."

Bobby furrowed his brow. "And? Do you want to see her again?"

Buck on his part was doing one hell of a job trying to bury his face deep into his mug. He took a considerably long time sipping on his coffee before answering.

"I think so yeah." Buck pondered on his next words carefully. "I think I need to you know?"

Bobby nodded. "You want the closure."

"Yeah something like that. It just ended so… suddenly. And it messed me up for a while there. I think I need that in order to really…" Buck stopped, a frown appeared on his forehead as he tried to piece the right words.

"Let go?" Bobby eventually offered and Buck nodded.

"Yeah I think I need that in order to… start something new." Buck shrugged as he took another sip from his mug.

Bobby smiled fondly, he felt nothing but pride at how much Buck had grown since he met him, at how much he matured right before his eyes.

"Is that something new you mentioned," he paused for a second, hesitant with his next words, _"Is it with Eddie?"_

Buck sputtered all over the table, coughing violently while his eyes threatened to pop out of his head. And Bobby had to bite back his laughter as he handed him a napkin. _Perhaps he should have waited 'till Buck put down his coffee._

" _Jesus!"_ Buck croaked as he wiped his mouth. "Not even gonna beat around the bush, huh?"

Bobby shrugged. "The older you get the more you learn there's really no point." He simply said. "So, is it with Eddie?" he pressed. "Although judging by your reaction it's pretty fair to say the answer is yes."

Buck scowled at him, but Bobby didn’t waver. He crossed his arms over his chest and waited.

"You're not gonna let it go, are you?"

"If you don’t want to talk about it, I'm not going to force you, Buck. But you _can_ if you want to. I'm not like your father. I don't care who you love as long as you are happy."

Buck glanced at him; a sullen look flashed on his face at the mention of his father for only a millisecond before his expression soften.

_"I think I'm in love with him."_

The admission was so quiet that it sounded as if it’s being spoken out loud for the first time. And perhaps, it was.

And try as he may, Bobby couldn’t stop the small laugh escaping from his lips. And before Buck could take offence Bobby shook his head with a smirk. "First of all, Buckaroo, you need to drop the 'think' part of that sentence."

Buck rolled his eyes exasperatedly. "And the second?" he huffed under his breathe.

"The second is… I am so happy for you."

"You're happy?" Buck blurted in disbelief. "You're happy that I am hopelessly in love with my best friend who doesn’t feel the same?"

Now it was his turn to roll his eyes. "The hopeless part I can believe, but the unrequited part I don’t quite follow. Unless we are talking about a different Eddie here. Are we?"

"Oh, not you too!" Buck groaned. "I get enough of that from Maddie and Athena alone."

"Did you ever stop to consider they might have a point?" Bobby teased; his face began to hurt by how hard he was grinning. A voice in his head that sounded alarmingly like his wife's scolded him for taking this much fun at Buck's expense.

"Bobby!" Buck drawled out in a long whine while he waved his hands in frustration. The action made him resemble a five-year-old about to throw a tantrum and Bobby was grateful Buck still possessed his childish antics, despite everything he's been through.

"Hey, all I'm saying is what makes you so sure Eddie doesn’t feel the same?"

_"Because he doesn’t!"_

"How do you know? Have you asked him? Did he tell you?"

"Bobby come on!" For a moment, Bobby thought Buck might _actually_ throw that tantrum. "You know very well I can't just go up to Eddie and ask him that!"

"Why?" Bobby asked deadpanned, having a hard time keeping a straight face. He knew he was dancing on a thin line and if that pensive crinkle on Buck's face was anything to go by… he was pretty sure Buck was trying to guess how much trouble he'd get into if he dumped the rest of his coffee onto Bobby's lap.

"Seriously?" Buck sent him a spiteful look. "Since when are you so invested in my love life?"

"Pretty much since Eddie started working here." Bobby finally gave in and burst into laughter, which only caused Buck to growl in annoyance.

"I'm really starting to regret this conversation now." Buck uttered irately and kicked at the Bobby's empty chair.

"Relax Kid, I'm just teasing you. But be honest with me, what makes you think Eddie doesn’t feel the same? So far all the evidence points to the contrary."

"Oh yeah?" Buck hissed, his hands grasping the chair in an iron grip. "What evidence is that?"

"Well…" Bobby scratched his chin as though in deep thought and Buck rolled his eyes again. "Let's start with the way he reacted when you got shot." He noticed Buck winced at the reminder and Bobby himself felt bile raise in his throat as the memories of that day flooded into his mind. "Then there's the fact he wouldn’t leave your bed side for days until Athena had to _physically_ force him to go home."

Buck opened his mouth to protest and Bobby hurried to keep going before he could. "There's also the fact that Eddie insisted you stay at his house until you recover. And the fact that you have a key to his house for over a year now, and he has a key to your place for even longer."

"That's not –"

"And I am willing to bet you also have a drawer full of clothes _and_ a toothbrush at his place. Just like Eddie has one at _your_ place, along with Christopher's stuff for when they sleep over."

Buck's silence was all the conformation he needed.

"He introduced you to most of his family. He listed you as one of Christopher's emergency contacts. He trusts _you_ with his son's life. You are the first person he wants to come too with a problem, and the first person he protects when there is danger. And frankly, I caught him staring at you far too many times than I care to admit. And there is a very clear reason why he was so angry when he couldn’t talk to you during the lawsuit, angry in a way no one else was. And today when Eddie saw you with Abby, he was jealous because he thinks you might still have feelings for her."

Buck was staring slack-jawed at floor. "We're best friends Bobby. It's normal to –"

Bobby resisted the urge to face-palm. "Buck, if you think all of what I just said is a typical 'best friend' behavior than I am afraid you might be too dense to notice what everyone else can clearly see, Eddie loves you."

"Even if he does –"

" _If?"_

 _"Even if he does,_ I still can't just…. I can't Bobby."

Bobby knew what he meant. H _e can't go to Eddie and tell him how he feels._

"Why?"

Buck fixated his eyes on the wall behind Bobby's head, they were glazing with unshed tears. "Because his wife died. Because he has Christopher to consider, and he should always come first. Because if it's going to happen it needs to come from him."

And Bobby ached at his pained voice.

"Buck –"

"I can't get my heart broken again, okay?" Buck snapped. "I just can't."

"Okay." Bobby sighed, he leaned forwards and placed his hand on Buck's shoulder, making him look at him. "I just hope neither of you waits until it's too late."

"Me too." Buck whispered.

Without warning a loud crash came from the stairs and they both jumped as they turned to see Chimney at the top of the staircase, cursing loudly as he rubbed on his foot. Hen and Eddie not far behind him, the former even pushed her best-friend forwards in order to get into the kitchen.

"Please tell me these are pancakes I'm smelling! I'm starv–" Hen called cheerily coming to an abrupt stop as she reached the table, causing both Eddie and Chimney to bump into her back. She raised an eyebrow at Bobby.

"Are we interrupting something?" Eddie voiced the unasked question for her as he stepped closer, eyeing Buck warily.

Buck's eyes darted from Eddie to Bobby, he opened his mouth, but nothing came out, rendered mute for the moment. So, Bobby shook his head and grabbed his mug, with the surely cold coffee by now and moved to the counter. "No. We were just talking."

"Are you sure?" Chimney piped up, shifting on his feet. "'Cause we can always –" he gestured his thumb towards the stairs. "– just come back later."

"There's no need. You should go ahead and eat before we get called in." Bobby simply motioned and refiled his coffee after pouring the cold one down the sink. He then turned with his back against the counter in order to make sure they do in fact eat as he watched them. _His family._

And It's was all Chimney needed to hear in order to grab a plate and b line towards the stove, thanking whoever listened for the eggs. Hen's observant gaze continued to dance between Buck and Bobby as she took a seat across from Buck, indulging in pancakes.

And Eddie, Bobby noted, remined glued to his spot in front of Buck for a long minute before occupying Bobby's vacant chair. "Are you okay?"

Buck seemed to have finally unfreeze and moved slightly in his chair before glancing at Eddie. "Yeah I'm fine." It also appeared he finally regained his ability to speak.

"Are you sure?" Eddie persisted, unconvinced.

Before Buck could assure him again Chimney plumped loudly next to Hen, he snatched a pancake from Hen's plate ignoring her harsh glare and stuffed his face with eggs. Obnoxiously. Without a doubt on purpose.

"Oh. My. God!" Chimney exclaimed with a mouth full. "These are so good. You are amazing Cap." He gushed.

Bobby chuckled, shifting his body more comfortably, he took a small sip from his mug, waiting until Chimney takes in another large bite. "Actually, Buck made these. But I appreciate the compliment."

Chimney's head snapped upwards." What?" he gulped, mouth gaping open and still filled with food. Hen didn’t bother to hide her disgust as she lifted a hand to his jaw, forcing him to close his mouth and chew. "Wait seriously?" He managed to coax eventually.

Three pairs of unimpressed eyes glared at him and Buck rolled his eyes. "Your vote of confidence in me is always so refreshing Chim."

"What? No, I didn't mean it like that! I was just surprised. Cap always makes breakfast. I'm impressed, this is really good."

Buck laughed. "I know man, I'm just messing with you."

Chimney stuck his tongue at him as a retort and it made Buck laugh harder, Hen joining not far behind. Eddie was still eyeing Buck cautiously, but there was a hint of a smile upon hearing Buck laugh.

And that expression in his eyes, all that admiration and love almost made Bobby regret not agreeing to Chimney's plan of locking them in the bunker. _Almost._

Buck was, without any doubt, wrong in his assumptions. Because there was no way Eddie Diaz wasn’t just as stupidly in love with Buck as Buck was with him.

And for two fairly smart men they sure acted stupid when it came to their feelings.

Bobby's was cut from his train of thoughts by a loud yawn coming from Buck. he glanced at his watch, 5:50 AM.

"Buck, maybe you should go try and catch some sleep while you still can. I'll save you a plate."

And for once Buck didn’t argue. "Yeah, I think you're right." He muffled another yawn into his fist and rose to his feet, stretching his body. "Thanks, by the way. For you know…" the rest of the sentence was drowned out by another yawn.

Bobby smiled at him. "Of course. Anytime kid."

Buck nodded weakly and patted Eddie on the back before moving towards the buckers. _"Thanks Dad._ " He murmured, clearly too tired to fully realize what he just said. The words just spilled out naturally.

Bobby froze, the mug still tightly in his grasp. He could tell the rest of the team around the table froze just the same but couldn’t bring himself to care. All he could do was watch Buck as he dragged himself down the stairs. Dead silence erupted in the loft, quiet enough to hear a pin drop.

_Thanks dad._

_Dad._

"Cap?"

All Bobby could feel was unconditional wave of affection for that boy he grew to love as a son. _He loved him._ He was his son. He couldn’t love him more than if he was his own. _He was his son, and he just called him dad._

It made him choke up.

"Bobby?"

_Buck called him dad_ , was all his mind let him think.

"Earth to Cap!"

It was Chimney who was yelling. But Bobby was pretty sure his brain was too fried with emotions right now to think straight.

"Oh my – _are you crying Cap?"_

Bobby blinked at the words, his body snapping out of it as if someone poured an ice bucket on him. And he realized that in fact, there were tears in his eyes attempting to pry out. And fighting to keep them at bay proved to be a challenge. He felt the same warmth in his heart as when Harry called him dad for the first time. And his reaction wasn’t that far behind.

And he couldn't believe how lucky he was.

_"Oh, he is so about to cry!"_

And Bobby let this one slide because well… _it was true._ And he finally understood what Athena felt that day the hospital.

When he turned to look at them Chimney was wearing a shit-eating grin while Eddie gave him a knowing, amused smirk. Hen was too busy glaring at the stairs in shock.

"Did he just…?" she drawled out in awe before her head twirled to Bobby so fast that he'd be worried if his mind could function properly.

"Yep." Chimney confirmed with glee. And he definitely wasn’t planning to let this one go anytime soon. Or ever.

Bobby would have said something about that, if he trusted his own voice enough to speak.

"Well it's not that surprising." Eddie pointed out bluntly, moving to fix himself a plate of pancakes nonchalantly. "It was bound to happen one day."

Hen simply nodded at his words, still too struck. And Chimney let out a sour grumble. "Man. Why didn’t we ever place a bet on _that one?"_ he then proceeded to stabbing a piece of pancake with a fork, in such force as though it personally offended him somehow.

Eddie narrowed his eyes. _"_ What do you mean by ' _that one'_?"

Chimney's hand, the one brining the fork to his lips, froze so abruptly with the pancake on it dropping with a thud to the plate, and Hen's eyes nearly bulging out just as she was about to take a sip of water was quite comical to witness.

"Huh..." Chimney croaked out, hand still stuck in the air, the realization slowly coming together on his face, like puzzle pieces. And Eddie squinted his eyes harder, growing more and more suspicious.

"Yeah?"

Bobby zoned out as Hen and Chimney quickly scrambled to their senses and began throwing flimsy excuses. Ones that Eddie wasn’t going to buy anyway. He decided to let them handle their own mess, partially as a payback for Chimney's previous remarks, knowing Hen will forgive him for throwing her under the bus as well. Instead he pulled out his phone and shot Athena a text. If anyone could understand what's going through his mind, it was his wife.

_He called me dad._

He didn’t even need to clarify who's the _'he'_ he was referring to. And his wife's replay came not a minute later

_It's something isn’t it? One of the best feelings in the world._

Bobby felt the smile spreading on his face. _Yes, it was._ He quickly typed a reply.

_Yeah. Nothing like it in the world._

And two minutes later the alarm blared trough the station and they all raced down to the trucks, while Eddie continued to argue with Hen and Chimney. And Buck came sprinting from the buckers, nearly plummeting onto his face as he attempted to put his boots on and run at the same time. Until finally, coming to halt at the truck and almost slipping before Eddie grabbed him by the waist to steady him causing them both to flush and provoking Hen and Chimney to tease them.

Bobby grinned through the whole scene, feeling more lighthearted than he had in a while as they boarded the truck. He laughed at their bickering during the whole ride. And when by the end of the call, Buck called him _dad_ once again – the word slipping out without notice just like before – Bobby had a hard time explaining to a confused and concerned Buck why he was fighting back tears. Or why Hen and Chimney fell to the floor with laughter.

And during the whole ordeal Athena's words echoed in his head.

_That boy will be the death of us._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I know I haven't updated in a while but life has been crazy... And since my country is currently under a quarantine thing it gives me some time to work on some fics.  
> This chapter took so long due to the worst case of writer's block. And the original draft was actually very different. And believe it or not, I wrote the Abby part of the story before they announced she's returning, and there's also a scene inspired by 9-1-1 lone star (you'll know which one) 
> 
> Anyway, hope it was worth the wait and thanks for all the comments and kudos<3


	6. Eddie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally finished and there's no feeling in the world like finishing a multi-chapter fic.  
> Anyway, hope the ending did it justice and I hope I'll get around to posting new fics soon,  
> including one about tarlos from lone star I've been working on... (awesome show by the way)  
> (I forgot to add the tumblr post that inspired the fic before: https://thiamismyanchor.tumblr.com/post/165471574638/scott-okay-from-now-on-we-need-to-be-straight and it's been brought to my attention, took a while to find it again but the lines are completely inspired by this post)   
> Stay safe and healthy everyone <3

He was an idiot.

Eddie supposed it was fitting. Later on he'll admit it was probably not at all the way he expected it to happen. Not by a long shot.

He didn’t realize he was in love with his best friend in a fit of jealousy, or by a close call, or a near death experience. _Oh no_ , he realized he was in love with one Evan Buckley in the most mundane way possible. It was kinda rude really, like a slap to the face.

It happened one morning about a week or so after Christmas. Buck had stayed the night after one of their many movie-nights with Chris; and that morning when Eddie stumbled into the kitchen still half-asleep, graciously accepting the cup of coffee Buck handed him with a lazy smile… _it just hit him like a ton of bricks._

_He's in love with Buck. And he's in love with his stupid smile. And these stupidly beautiful eyes nobody should be allowed to have, yeah he's in love with these too._

It was the most surreal sensation Eddie ever experienced. He just stood there, _hovering in his own damn kitchen_ , staring blankly at his best friend making breakfast in borrowed pajamas and disheveled bed-hair – which only made him unfairly attractive in Eddie's opinion – looking like the most beautiful thing he had ever laid eyes on. And all Eddie could think for a solid five minutes was what an unbelievable idiot he is.

_Because of-course he's in love with Buck. And of-course he wouldn’t realize until he was too far gone._

And Buck took notice to his silent internal unraveling; of-course he did. After all Eddie was practically ogling at him till his coffee ran cold in his hand, pondering the best way to bang his head on the wall, repeatedly, without causing permanent damage.

Luckily, or maybe unluckily Eddie still wasn’t sure, Christopher's crutches tapping down the hall snapped him out of it and prevented Buck from asking what was wrong.

They haven’t talked about it. And ever since that day Eddie found himself reflecting on all the other moments they never talked about. All these moments that felt just a little too long for them to be _just_ best friends, a lengthy look, or a lingering touch... but Buck never said anything to insinuate the feelings were mutual and Eddie - Eddie was too much of a chicken to say something himself.

He wanted to blame the grief, telling himself it was too soon to move on after Shannon. But that was a lie, he and Shannon fell out of love long before they attempted to salvage the shambled pieces of their marriage. It took him a long time to accept that, to admit he was only angry at her for asking for divorce because she realized it first. It took him even longer to forgive her for dying. There will always be a part of him that loves her, he was far beyond done fighting it. It took longer than he cared to acknowledge to come to that conclusion. But he got there. He was at peace with it, grateful even. He will always be grateful for Shannon; without her he wouldn’t have Christopher.

Afterwards he moved on to blame Buck's sexuality, which got knocked out cold when he found out Buck was bi. He tried blaming their friendship, deeming it too important to ruin. He even blamed Chris for a humiliating moment, thinking his son wasn’t ready to see him with anyone but his mother. That one got knocked out of the park when Chris asked him one day, _point-blank_ , if he was going to start dating again, saying it's okay if he wants to because he wants him to be happy; Eddie almost cried right then and there.

He played jump rope with his excuses, some coming back around to toy with him. Most then any other, the desire to preserve their friendship reared its ugly head the most often.

Logically, he knew that if Buck didn’t reciprocate his feelings Buck wouldn’t stop talking to him or hang out with Christopher or himself. Hell, Buck probably wouldn’t even make things awkward between them being the kind, selfless man he is. And Eddie hated that small part of him that whished Buck would react badly to justify why he acted like a fucking coward.

He worked up the courage to bring it up in a session with Frank after two months of internal torment. And Frank's features simply enveloped in surprise before quickly dissolving into a soft smile that Eddie believed was pride. Frank jumped right into it, prompting Eddie to discuss his feelings and encourage him to admit them to Buck every session since. Eddie regretted telling him ever since. Mostly because Frank was just _insufferably right._

But Eddie was a coward. A coward with abandonment issues which deemed to be the worst kind. That's why he just let the months pile up, one by one, letting the opportunities pass him by without taking the plunge, and watch as they slip through the cracks. The closest he came to telling Buck, by far, was at the hospital after he got shot.

So, honestly, he shouldn’t have been _that_ surprised when Athena all but detained him at her front door after dropping Christopher off for his play date with Harry and Denny at her and Bobby's house, despite his protests for being in a hurry.

"Your shift doesn’t start for another hour; you have time for one cup of coffee." She told him pointy and titled her head in the direction of the kitchen.

With that she walked away, leaving him shuffling awkwardly in the hall, and Eddie knew better than trying to make a run for it. So with a heavy heart, he followed her.

"Eddie." Michael greeted him once there, with a look resembling pity. "I'd offer you something stronger if you weren’t heading to work." He joked, motioning at his mug and patting the empty seat beside him.

Eddie sighed and reluctantly sat down at the table, his eyes trailing after Athena fiddling with the coffee pot by the counter. He childishly felt like he'd been called to the principal office. It’s not that he avoided Athena since the hospital per-say, but the fact they hadn’t had a chance to talk since then was a blessing in disguise in Eddie's book. Not that he didn’t gravely appreciate her help that day.

"It'll be over faster if you don’t let her get to you." Michael chimed beside him, voice lowered into a faint whisper. "She acts all rough but she's a big softie. So just remember, the most important thing is to _not_ feed her fear." 

All Eddie could do in reply was nod just as Athena stepped into view, putting a mug down in front of him before settling into the chair across from them.

Before Eddie could even thank her or make a move to drink the coffee as a courtesy – his mother raised him with manners after all – Athena's voice already loomed over. Calm, yet utterly terrifying.

"So... what are your intentions with Buck?" her face creased into a deadly serious expression. And Eddie nearly choked on air, only partially imagining ' _my_ _son'_ being said instead of Buck's name _._

 _Dios mio._ Eddie never thought that at 32 he'd ever find himself in this position. He knew Athena loved Buck as a son, but this was overdoing it a little. His body stilled, hand hovering over the mug, mouth gaping. "What?" he chuckled nervously.

Athena's stern glare only lasted another five agonizing seconds before Michael caved, breaking into laughter

"Oh, don't mind her." he wheezed between breaths, "May's brining her boyfriend over later tonight to meet us, she's just using you as target practice." He explained to a confused Eddie with a sympathetic glance.

"And you ruined it." Athena scolded, her features softening non the less and Eddie relaxed instantly. Silently cursing his hopeless ass for that desperate part of him itching for her to like him. _You're acting like a fucking teenager,_ his brain taunted. And he found himself praying for the brave soul courageous enough to date May Grant.

"Oh..." Eddie said with a shaky laugh, hand recoiling back to his side while Athena offered him another reassuring smile.

"You could still answer you know." She then said, sounding amused.

"I, huh…"

"Yes?"

Eddie gulped. "I don't –"

"Don't you dare say _'I don’t know what you're talking about'_ Diaz." She advised in perfect combination of motherly admonish and her firm 'officer Grant' tone.

Eddie nodded solemnly to that; his gaze casted down to his lap as he played with his hands.

_"I love him. I'm in love with him. To a point where’s it's getting ridiculous really."_

It wasn’t the first time he admitted the words out loud, still felt like it though. It's not like he feared Athena or Michael would use it against him or run along telling Buck. And yet, he still couldn’t look at either of them.

" _Good._ But I already knew that." Athena's voice was gentle now, warm. "That wasn’t the question though sweetie."

Eddie peered at her, glimpsing the comforting smile he's seen her give Buck handful of times before. And he can feel Michael's eyes burning on him as well.

"Well?"

"Athena, maybe you shouldn't –"

"I want to be with him. I really do. Like as the whole freaking deal. House, marriage, kids, well _more_ kids at least... all of that. I want it." 

Both Athena and Michael seemed just as surprised as Eddie himself when the words left his lips, with much more ease than anticipated. And he let out a heavy sigh. "But –"

"No buts." Athena cut in quickly with a shake of the head while waving her hand. "That's all I needed to hear. The rest is up to you."

Eddie blinked at her, an odd sensation of coming up for air after integration filling his senses. She looked at him a certain way, as if she knows an important piece of the puzzle he's unbearably unaware to. A piece he desperately _needs_ to know.

"That's it? You're not gonna ask me anything else?" Eddie traded with caution, and a voice in his head screamed at him to take the win and not fuel the fire farther. Even Michael glared at him alarmed.

Athena raised an eyebrow and Michael hummed into his drink. "You're a brave one, I'll give you that." he mused approvingly.

Eddie frowned at him before glancing back at Athena, trying his best to keep up a straight face despite his bumbling nerves tearing up his insides.

When Athena finally nodded Eddie felt safe enough to reach out for his coffee again, bringing the mug up to his lips. It was good, similar to the coffee Bobby often brought over to the station.

Athena cleared her throat suddenly, "There is one more thing though..." she said. and he swore she purposely waited for him to take a sip before speaking.

Eddie coughed, barely avoiding inhaling the drink all the way up his nose, the rest of his face wasn’t as lucky. And Michael snorted next to him. _Yeah, she definitely did it on purpose._

"So...:" Athena silently handed him a napkin without batting an eye, tip of her lip crawling up. "I'm sure you're aware Buck have been meeting with Abby recently."

"Yeah." Eddie stared right back, feeling like he's being shinned on with a bright light under her observant eye, and biting back a curse at the way his body unwittedly reacted at the mention of Buck's ex. "I'm aware."

Athena's expression molted into a victorious one, like a cat about to pounce it's pray, before asking, "Do you want to know what he said about it? About her?" 

For some reason, Eddie had a feeling the answer to that would be a different one than what Buck had told him.

"That's not really my business –"

"He said that even if she had stayed, it wouldn’t have worked out between them."

There was something in the way Athena watched him, he noticed it about her the first time they met, she had a way about her… to uncover deep secrets and insecurities with one look and help solve them. He admired that about her.

After a long pause she continued, "And you know why that is?"

Eddie reluctantly shook his head and Athena reached out to grab his hand.

"He said it's because Abby doesn’t want kids. And that's something they never got around to talk about, given they didn’t date very long."

He stared at her perplexed, unsure what she's getting at and Athena sighed. "He then said that even _if_ she wanted kids, he wouldn’t trade Christopher for the world."

Eddie felt his heart flutter quickly in his chest, a warm gooey feeling spreading through his stomach at the words. Which was stupid, he already knew Buck loved Chris like he was his own kid. He knew that. He heard Buck say it even, multiple times. He heard other people say it too. Hell, his own parents said it. He felt Athena squeeze his hand and saw her mouth moving but his thoughts raced a hundred miles a second to pay attention. Every memory of him, Buck and Chris flushing in front of his eyes in slow motion. And his poor weak heart swelled with love for his best friend. _As if he could possibly love that man more._

 _"I think you broke him."_ Michael's voice echoed in his ears suddenly, cheery and worried simultaneously.

And Eddie partly heard Athena mummering something in response, not quite catching whatever it was.it all just sounded like loud humming.

He forced himself to focus, to get a grip and pull it together. Only to see Athena giving him a knowing smirk. He wondered if she knew he didn’t trust himself to speak without cracking. She probably did.

"As much as I'm sure Athena wants to keep torturing you…" Michael piped up and Eddie startled, almost forgetting the man was there as well. "You should probably get going if you want to make it in time." He pointed out, tapping at his wrist.

Eddie glanced at his own watch and cursed, quickly scrambling up to his feet, a firm grasp at his hand stopping him. He turned to Michael studying him thoughtfully. "Can I give you one piece of advice?"

He wasn’t even done nodding before Michael continued, "Don’t wait too long. You always regret the things you don’t do far more than the ones you do."

Eddie pursed his lips, the words daunting him right to his core. He nodded again, slowly standing up before being wrapped up in a warm embrace from Athena. He stumbled back a little in surprise before hugging her back, feeling his mind ease to her comforting touch.

He felt her rub his back tenderly, her voice soothing in his ear.

_"Just take good care of my boy."_

**\--**

In the week since his conversation with Athena and Michael the universe seemed to throw a recurring theme right in his face whenever it so pleased.

It was getting a little frustrating.

First, one of his sisters, the youngest - Rosita - called in tears. He spent almost an hour on the phone comforting her, listening how it took her too long to realize her feelings for her friend, who now was happily in a relationship with someone else. Then Chimney told them a story about an old friend who only realized he was in love with his best friend during her weeding ceremony, to which he objected only to end up getting rejected, and now the two were no longer on speaking terms. That same day they ended up taking Maddie out to the bar after a grueling shift – she intercepted a dying man's call to 911, connecting the call to his boyfriend who he never got the courage to profess his love to.

The incidences kept piling up, one after another. Different yet painfully similar. Eddie was partially terrified that somehow Athena orchestrated the whole thing, he wouldn’t put it past the woman. She could move mountains with sheer will power alone. _She would definitely defy the natural order of the universe just to shove this in his face._

It seemed like no one noticed what his internal-slowly-turning-external crisis was about, but he was pretty sure Bobby winked at him during the call where the two people they saved breathlessly proclaimed their love before sharing a heated kiss in front of them. That made him suspect Athena might have clued her husband in on the joke.

And he wouldn’t put it past his own unbalanced karma to be the one to dull out this punishment that way. He was a whiff away from pulling his hair out when he got a day of peace, or so to speak. Because the day was nothing but peaceful.

It started out weird enough already. Buck and Bobby weren’t with them on shift – an occurrence which Eddie can't for the life of him remember happening last. But two of the firefighters from the other team got injured in a big fire, rendering the station down two men. Bobby moved around schedules for the best of his abilities, brining in replacements from other stations when possible. But one problem led to another, and with no available bodies Bobby volunteered himself, and Buck later volunteered too for extra help, and they ended up assigned to different shifts. Which resulted with Eddie, Hen and Chimney starting the night shift working under the other's teams captain, John, who was now pulling a 24 hour shift instead of going home.

Eddie could deal with that, he liked the guy overall, he wasn’t Bobby, but he liked him.

The world however decided to throw nothing but obstacles his way. They lost more people then they saved. Granted their chance to save them were slim to begin with, didn’t make it any easier though. The damn alarm wouldn’t stop going off too, call after call. They spent more time on the truck than the station. Without Bobby around, and them being completely wiped out to even attempt to cook, they simply plummeted on the couch and ordered pizza somewhere around midnight. And of-course, with their luck, not only was their order late, but they got another call. The fact it ended up being their delivery man flanged to the concrete, barely clinging to life, was the icing on their crappy shift cake.

Eddie was starting to miss the unknown eternity out there, slapping signals in his face left and right. He would rather endure that then people dying under his watch one more time. So naturally, the world decided: w _hy not give him both._

His heart dropped to his feet the moment he stepped foot at the scene. There was a man trapped neck deep under a car – how was he still breathing was beyond him – and a woman holding a child Eddie presumed was her daughter as she yelled out for help. She begged and pleaded for them to save her best friend to no avail, sobbing how he pushed her daughter out of the moving car to save her. The girl herself was crying, burying her face in her mother's chest. And when the driver turned out to be a drunk it was simply the ruthless cherry on top of it all. 

To Eddie it felt like some cruel cosmic joke. There was no saving the man, the moment they'll lift the car off him his organs will succumbed, and he'll bleed out from his wounds. The injures were too severe, the only thing they could do for them was let them to say goodbye.

It was brutal to watch, John was hovering by, eyes closed, and jaw clenched .Eddie could feel Hen and Chimney shaking behind him as the women kneeled in front of the barely conscious man, her daughter in her arms reaching out to stroke his face that broke into a faint smile upon seeing her. The whole thing felt like an otter-body experience. The distant declarations and sobs ringing in his ears long after they boarded the truck again, driving back to the station in complete silence.

_He must have royaly pissed off someone in another life to get a front seat to that._

Eddie wanted to scream at the empty sky _._ If he was more of a narcissist, he would probably yell at whosever out there to stop tearing people apart to prove him a point.

He never wished for a shift to be over with than he did in that moment. And perhaps he had some good karma left because they were granted a full two hours of unintrupted sleep before the alarm went off again.

**\--**

_"I'm not angry. I'm just disappointed."_

That was such a dad-thing to say, and Eddie would know, he was a father. And yet, he lowered his head in shame at Bobby's harsh tone. He never handled being disciplined well.

They just tried to do a nice thing for their captain when their night shift neared a surprisingly quiet ending. Mostly, they did it to distract themselves form the nights events. Since Bobby came for the morning shift, they decided to cook him breakfast. As a thank you for all the meals he prepared for them over the years. It did not go well.

They butted heads, arguing over who does what and so neither of them noticed when the pan caught fire in the background. And trying to get a handle on things only caused more chaos. The kitchen looked like a war zone. Water and foam all over the floor, walls, counter and stove. The smell of burned food stinking up the room and the general mess from when they attempted to make breakfast… it was one big mess.

Eddie figured John was still passed out exhausted in the bunks to notice the mayhem, or care. 

Bobby walked in to find them in a screaming match. Hen was holding the burned pan; Chimney was throwing away the ruined food and Eddie was still holding the fire extinguisher; all while yelling at each other.

Perhaps it was due to the exhaustion from their shift and rough calls during the night, their low fumes, or maybe it was the inevitable fight looming over their heads. When you spend nearly everyday with someone, you bound to hit a few snags. But Eddie was still not sure how things escalated to _this._

"Cap –"

"No." Bobby held up his hand, pointing an accusing finger at them. "I am touched at the gesture, really. But that was my favorite wok. Athena got me that."

The three of them shared a guilty look.

"We're sorry Cap." Hen grimaced. "We'll get you a new one."

"Yeah. A better one." Chimney hurried to add. "It will be so good you won't even miss this one."

Bobby wasn’t amused. "It's not the – what the hell happened?"

"Well you see, Eddie was supposed to – "

"Me?" Eddie shouted, turning to glare at Chimney. "No! You were the one who –"

"For the love of god will you stop?"

Eddie and Chimney froze. Their head snapped to Hen in sync. " _Of-course you'd say that!_ You're the one who forgot to watch the stove!"

Hen let out a dramatic squeal. "No I didn't! That was _Eddie's_ job!"

"No it wasn’t! It was Chimney's!"

" _What?!_ No! it –"

" _Stop!"_ Bobby raised his voice loud enough to make them shut up. "Just clean this up before you leave."

Chimney mumbled something under his breath. He sent Hen and Eddie a stink-eye before moving to the counter, grumbling as he began to wipe down the tile.

"We're really sorry Bobby." Eddie said when he finally put down the fire-extinguisher. "We just wanted to do something nice for you."

"I know." Bobby gave them a small smile and grabbed the pan from Hen's hand, stroking it sadly. "Just leave the cooking for me from now on." his brows furrowed pensively, " _Or Buck_."

Hen and Eddie gasped. "I cannot believe you just said that!" Hen exclaimed, sounding deeply offended.

Bobby raised an eyebrow. "Buck's the only one of you who actually follows the recipe _. And doesn’t burn it down_."

"That's –"

"No, he's right." Eddie cut Hen off, and she gave him a look of disbelief. "Come on, you and I are a lot of things, but good cooks ani't one."

Hen pouted but didn’t comment. It was true. The two of them barely knew how to prepper three dishes. They knew the basics, that was about it. Karen did most of the cooking for Hen and Denny, and Eddie… Eddie mainly relied on his Abuela's and Tia's help. And Buck's. Buck who was surprisingly an amazing cook. Which only made Eddie's hopeless love for him that much harder to ignore. Especially when Buck would cook meals for his son,. 

"Exactly." Bobby stated before moving farther into the kitchen, he put down the pan with a mournful expression before poring himself a cup of coffee from the pot. Which remained strangely undamaged from all the chaos. "Like I said, leave it to us. I can't afford to lose any more woks."

Hen let out a sigh of defeat. "Yeah I guess you're right, Cap. But I'm still saying it's all Chimney's fault!"

"Hey! I wasn’t the one who –"

"Guys come on –"

 _"Enough!"_ Bobby sighed, he pinched the bridge of his nose, obviously exhausted. "Alright, I'm gonna need everyone to be completely straight with each other from here on out. No more fighting. Okay?"

Hen rolled her eyes but nodded. "Okay Cap."

" _I'm always straight_." Eddie called defensively.

Bobby's mouth opened to respond when they heard a strangled chain of coughing behind them. When they turned, they saw Chimney, choking on a bagel.

" _Oh man…_ " Chimney coaxed through his wheezing. "That's the biggest lie you ever told."

Eddie frowned, trying to ignore Hen's particularly loud snickering and Bobby grinning into his mug. "What does that mean?"

Chimney paused; his hand froze mid-wiping the crumbs from his mouth. "Come on dude!" He had a shit-eating look on his face now. "We _all_ know what I mean."

Oh… _Oh._

 _Of-course Chimney would bring up his not-so-subtle feelings for Buck._ He had a feeling they all knew anyway. It's not like he's been too sneaky or carful, they were bound to find out.

Eddie rolled his eyes, forcefully pushing down the blush warming up his cheeks. "Oh, you mean _that?_ I'm not – wait a second –" he frowned again, suddenly realizing… he never did came out to them. He told Buck, but he didn't tell them.

"Did I tell you guys I'm bi?"

It's not like he tried to hide it. It just never come up. He knew he was bisexual since he was 19. He dated a few men before he met Shannon. But it's not like he did much dating since he moved to LA in general to bring up the subject. He knew they wouldn't care.

"Well no, you didn't." Hen cleared her throat. "But It's not like we didn't guess already... thanks for coming out to us though." She clasped his shoulder with a supportive glint to her eyes. _"Welcome to the team._ "

Eddie laughed heartedly. He noticed the encouraging smile on Chimney's face and the proud look Bobby gave him. It made him feel warm, god _he loved them so much. Even if they drove him up the wall sometime._

"Like I was saying." Chimney suddenly continued as if nothing happened, _he was fucking gloating_. "We _all_ saw you checking out Buck's ass enough times to know."

"Shit." Eddie growled; he made a point to stare at the floor so they couldn’t see his face burn, _he was a grown man for god's sake_.. "Does everyone know about that?"

"Pretty much. I mean the only one who doesn’t is Buck." Hen was laughing again. "But you did check out his ass a lot to be fair."

"I wasn't checking out his ass that -"

 _"Whose ass are we checking?"_ Buck came striding up the stairs cheerily, he clapped his hands together excitedly, eyes darted between them all. He was dressed in uniform and ready for his shift. "Come on guys! Whose ass are we checking?" he asked again. 

Eddie heart leaped into his throat. He panicked; his eyes dashing from Bobby to Hen asking for help. But they seemed to be just as frozen as he was.

" _Mine!"_ Chimney blurted out and stepped in front of Buck before anyone else could stop him. "I've been doing this new work-out lately and it's finally paying off."

Buck raised an eyebrow before he groaned. "Oh, please tell me it doesn’t have anything to do with my sister's sex life."

"I wish I could Buckaroo." Chimney shook his head, rubbing the back of his neck. "I wish I could."

Buck scrunched up his face and shoved him out of the way. "You disgust me, man."

"I know." Chimney chuckled nervously, sending Eddie a look over Buck's shoulder, clearly calming: ' _you owe me'._

And Eddie rolled his eyes at that, _there was a reason he didn’t ask Chimney for help to begin with._

 _"_ Is there anything to – _woah!_ What happened here?" Buck whistled when he finally spotted the kitchen, coming to a full halt; It was clear he was weighing his options, deciding to grab himself some coffee instead of trying his luck with the food.

Bobby laughed. "Don't worry about it, kid. It's being taken care of."

Before Buck could address another question, the alarm went off. They all tensed and made a collective move towards the stairs.

"Not so fast." Bobby placed down his mug and raised a hand to stop Chimney, Eddie and Hen from fallowing them to the truck.

"But Cap –"

"You three are sitting this one out." He gestured his head at the kitchen before turning away. "Clean this up and head home." The order in his voice was indisputable as he walked away.

And Buck's laughter at their reaction wasn’t helping.

"Oww… that sucks guys. Don’t worry we'll try not to have too much fun without you." He blew them a kiss before skipping after their captain.

"That little…" Hen didn’t finish the sentence, instead she decided to flip off the air where Buck last stood.

"I hope it’s a damn cat stuck up a tree." Chimney mumbled, holding up a mop from the closet. "Eddie! stop staring at your boy's ass and come help!"

Eddie tore his eyes away from his spot by the railing to growl at Chimney.

_"Shut up man!"_

**\--**

It took them about an hour to finish up the cleaning. Eddie stood with Chimney at the locker room now, both changing into their clothes in silence.

"Hey Eddie, can I ask you something?" Chimney cleared his throat once Eddie was done buttoning up his shirt and picked up his duffle bag from the bench.

"Sure..."

Chimney sighed; he closed his locker before leaning on it, arms crossed. "Why won’t you do anything about it?"

Eddie blinked. "What?" he decided to play dumb, even though he had a pretty good idea what his friend was getting at. Chimney did as well.

 _"Really dude?"_ Chimney rolled his eyes. " _Buck!_ Why won’t you do something about it? I mean he obviously loves you. And You clearly feel the same. Why not do something about it?"

_Oh, so he's getting right into it then?_

"It's not that simple." Eddie said, suddenly finding the strap of his bag very interesting. He could feel Chimney glaring at him.

"But it is."

Eddie nearly crawled out his skin at the familiar voice. He turned to see Hen and Bobby standing by the doorframe. He panicked for a moment, half expecting to see Buck standing behind them.

"Don’t worry. Buck's on clean up duty." Bobby said and took a step closer. "But Chim's right. You should do something about it. Why haven't you?"

Eddie started at Bobby dumbstruck. He didn’t peg his captain for the meddling type.

"Because it complicated."

"No! It's not." Hen all but threw her hands up in frustration. "It's really not. You're best friends. You both love each other. He absolutely adores your son. Seems pretty easy to me."

Eddie closed his eyes and leaned back on the lockers, his bag falling off his shoulder. _Was this the final test of the day or something?_

He was exhausted from the shift, both mentally and physically. He really wasn't in the right frame of mind to deal with this right now.

It's not that he never thought of it before – manning up, asking Buck out, telling him how he feels. He even contemplated just walking up to him, grab his stupidly gorgeous face and kiss him. It was one of Eddie's favorite daydream fantasies to be honest. And it's not like he never suspected, even a tiny bit, that Buck liked him back. There been handful of stolen moments where he thought, maybe, just maybe Buck felt the same. But then fear would set in, and doubt. And these were far greater than the smidge of hope he felt whenever Buck looked at him through these big, adoring eyes.

_What if Buck doesn’t feel the same? What if Buck wouldn’t want to be friends anymore once he found out? What if he screws this up? What if Buck leaves again? What if Buck does feel the same but then realize Eddie wasn’t enough and walk out like Shannon? What if he loses the best friend he ever had? How would he face Christopher knowing he messed everything up? What if -_

"You're overthinking, Eddie." Bobby's voice pulled him out of his thoughts. Eddie flickered his eyes open and was met with Bobby's reassuring ones.

"I just… I don’t want to lose him over this. Let's say that by some crazy chance, he does feel the same –"

"Oh, trust us, he does." Hen snorted.

"Even If he does feel the same –" Eddie ignored the remark and the way it made his stomach turn. "I still can't… I don’t want to screw it up."

Bobby looked at him sympathetically. " _Then don't._ " he simply said, as if it was all there is.

Eddie stared at Bobby _, god he wished it could be that simple._ He contemplated just telling them to mind their own business only to find his mouth having a mind of his own.

"You don't think I want that? There isn’t anything I wouldn’t give to just be able to – but there are too many risks. What if we don’t work out? _What then, huh?_ How do we keep working together every day? How do we even stay friends? _And what about Chris_? He loves Buck so much. I can't do this to him again. I can't do it to _myself_ again."

Eddie panted; he was heaving from the confession. He felt like a weight was lifted off his shoulders. He spent so long drowning under these fears, it felt good to let it all out. He could hear a Frank-like voice beaming ' _progress'_ in his head.

He watched as they eyed him thoughtfully, if he didn’t know any better, he'd say it was pity.

"Eddie." It was Hen who eventually broke the silence; she took a step closer and tilted her head in understanding. "There will always be more reasons why not to do something then why do it. There will always be excuses. And everything you just said? It was excuses. You're just trying to shield yourself from pain and I get that." she reached out for his hand and squeezed it. "But life is full of pain anyway."

"She's right." Chimney said before Eddie could fully process Hen's words. "Life is full of pain. And regret. And if you don’t do this because you held yourself back, you'll always regret that. Yes, it might end bad, and yes it might be a mistake. But any one of us could also die tomorrow."

Eddie felt a tightness at his heart when Shannon's face flashed in front of him. 

"The bigger mistake is not seizing every opportunity while you still have it." Chimney finished with a note of bitter-truth and a click of his tongue as Eddie's eyes downcast to his boots.

"Couldn’t have said it any better myself." Eddie startled when a familiar hand touched his shoulder and he dared to look up at his captain.

"I know you are scared, _son_. But you also happen to be one of the bravest men I ever met." Bobby lowered his head, so their eyes were at the same level.

"And I say, _just take a leap._ And go on from there."

Eddie swallowed the lump on his throat. They made some good points. _Some very good points._ He knew they were right. Life's too risky to not take a chance. To not at least try. _Didn’t make it any less scary._

His thoughts drew back to the other day, when Buck drove to his house in the middle of the night just because Christopher had a nightmare and was asking for him. He thought how Buck read him a story and held his hand until he ended up falling asleep on the floor… how his face lit up sleepy when he realized it was Eddie dragging him to guest room. And Eddie remembered wishing he could just lie down beside him, how he wanted Buck to be there all the time.

_And didn't the world show him what holding out could turn out into? How much the consequences would hurt? Buck wasn't exactly known for not being prone to danger... truth was, they could both die any day, more so then most people. And if he waits till it's too late he'll never forgive himself._

"Okay." He found himself whispering after a long silence. "Okay. I'll do it."

Chimney pumped his fist. "Attaboy!" he clapped Eddie on the back. "Go get him!"

Bobby shook his head at Chimney with a fond expression and stepped aside to clear the path. The look he gave Eddie simply said _'I'm proud of you'._

_He wanted to do it. He wanted to go find Buck and tell him how feels. He wanted to. Why won't his feet move?_

_"_ I'm gonna do it." He mumbled to himself and forced himself to turn to the door. _He can do it. He went to war for god's sake._

"Okay then." Hen hummed proudly beside him. " _Go get your man!"_

Eddie paused, suddenly his legs felt heavier than ever. Chimney and Bobby were sending him supportive smiles, well Bobby at least. Chimney's resembled more of an amusement at his misery.

Hen let out a loud sigh. "Go. _Go_ ask Buck to dinner, be smooth. _Go_." She emphasized each word by shoving Eddie out of the locker room some more.

_Alright then. This is it, he's gonna do it._

Just as he stepped outside the locker-room, he heard Hen's faint voice;

_"You do realize this means neither of us will win now?"_

_"Yeah."_ There was a smile to Chimney's reply. " _It's worth it_."

**\--**

Eddie could still hear Hen's voice encouraging him in his head as he watched Buck clean the trucks down at the bay. He was humming to himself, swaying his hips to an invisible tune.

"Hey." Eddie coaxed out as he approached Buck.

 _Just be cool,_ he told himself. _Feel out the land, ask him to dinner, keep it casual._

Buck jumped, he tripped over the bucket and banged his head as he fell onto the truck. The cloth in his hand dropped to the floor.

" _Jesus dude!"_ he cried out and scrambled to his feet. "Warn a guy."

"Sorry." Eddie grimaced, stopping himself from reaching out to check. "You okay?"

"Yeah." Buck rubbed his head and winched. "I had worse. What's up?"

Eddie frowned at the statement but chose not to comment. He took a deep breath; today was the perfect opportunity. Buck had a short shift and Christopher was going to a sleepover at a friend. It was now or never.

_Just do it._

"Do you wanna come over for dinner tonight?"

Buck smiled and bend down to pick up the towel, his face turning playful. "Sure, sound great actually. Can we order pizza though? I don’t think it's a good idea you burn down your kitchen…" _._

"Yeah sure." Eddie rolled his eyes at the jab.

"Cool. Want me to rent a movie or something? Don’t worry, I'll get something suitable for children. What is the name of that movie Chris wouldn’t stop talking abou– "

_"I'm in love with you."_

_Fuck._ The words flew out of his mouth before he could even register what was happening. Or stop it. _So much for being smooth._

There was a squish sound as the cloth met the floor again. Buck stared at him, eyes bulging, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water.

He planned to tell Buck that Christopher won't be joining them for dinner, that it will be just the two of them when his brain decided to stop functioning. He wasn’t sure if it was the months of pent up feelings or the way Buck cared for his son so much to think of him first, always… but there was no taking it back. The one thing he knew for sure was that he never wished for the ground to swallow him whole more than he did right now.

_"What?"_

"I huh…" Eddie was pretty sure he was about to die, right then and there. If the way his heart raced was any indication and Eddie never felt more betrayed by himself his while life.

" _What did you just say?"_

 _"I –_ I said it sounds great."

He grimaced as the lie slipped from his lips, face burning under Buck's intense glare.

"No, no." Buck shook his head slowly as he pointed at him with shaky finger. "You said – you said you were…" he shook his head again in disbelief. " _You're in love with me_?"

Yep, this is how he's going to die. If he was a more optimist of a person, he'd say Buck was looking at him with _hope._

"Eddie?" Buck pleaded; his eyes were darting nervously. "Are you?"

Eddie sighed. "I… yeah. I'm in love with you." He tossed his bag to the floor and threw his hands up. _It's not like he could take it back, not like he wanted to._ "I fucking love you alright!? I am stupidly, head-over heels, _can't-stop-thinking-about-you-so-much-it-fucking-hurts_ in love with you, _you idiot!_ " he was pretty sure he yelled that last part loud enough for everyone in the station to hear but couldn’t care less anymore. He could practically taste the hypocrisy for calling Buck an idiot.

 _"_ Eddie I…" Buck gulped, his voice dying in his throat. He appeared speechless, for once in his life.

 _"_ I was gonna come here and ask you to dinner, just the two of us. Chris is at a sleepover tonight. I was gonna ask you on a date and I just ruined everything, like always –"

Buck cut in. "You don’t ruin everything." He whispered, taking a step closer.

"Look I get it if I scared you off." Eddie kept going as if Buck didn’t interrupt him, somewhat acknowledging he was still loud, too loud. "And I get it if you don't feel the same way. I mean I did just drop this huge bomb. And I was getting the feeling there was something between us and I was too scared to act on it before. And telling you I love you before we even go on our first date is – "

Eddie never finished his rant. His back was shoved against the truck roughly and his mouth was silenced by Buck grabbing his face and smashing their lips together. _Hard._ And before he could fully comprehend what was happening, or kiss him back, Buck pulled away.

And Eddie _did not_ try to chase after his lips, _he did not._

Buck let out a little laugh, a very happy one, one that made his eyes sparkle and his nose crinkle. "I love you too, _stupid._ " He breathed softly and pressed their foreheads together, his thumb tenderly stroking Eddie's cheek. "I love you so damn much. God, I loved you for a long time, but I knew I had to wait for you to make the first move."

It was Eddie's turn to be rendered speechless. He looked up at Buck, his mouth gaping as he tried to understand what Buck said. _He loved him back._

_Buck loved him._

_Buck was waiting for him to be ready._

Instead of saying anything he simply clutched Buck's shirt collar and pulled him in for a kiss. He figured that was a better use for his mouth than miserly trying to form out words anyway. It was a little awkward at first, with teeth clanking and Buck shambling on his feet with surprise. But the moment Buck slipped in a tongue and cupped his cheek with one hand, and his waist with the other, Eddie was pretty sure his brain short cricetid. It turned into wandering hands and hot breaths that made his knees weak awfully fast. And if he bothered to care he'd be embarrassed by the noises that came out of him. Or the fact he was pretty sure someone wolf whistled in the distance. _But he didn’t._ All he could think about was Buck pressed up against him, Buck's lips, and just… _Buck._

_As far as second kisses go… it was the best he ever had._

And it was all broken when the alarm went off. It was like the spell had been lifted. Buck pulled back with a groan, he rested one hand on the truck by Eddie's head, burying his face in Eddie's neck. " _No. No. No!"_

"You should go." Eddie laughed but didn’t let go of Buck's hips.

"I –"

"Buckley! Break it up. I'll give you one minute to get your ass in the truck."

Bobby's voice echoed from the other side of the room, looming over the alarm. When they turned to look, over the people running around, they saw their captain with his arms crossed over his chest and a wide smile on his face. Eddie noticed Hen and Chimney standing next to him, wearing identical grins, the latter even giving them a thumbs up. Suddenly it became clearer who whistled at them earlier.

 _God, he loved them so much,_ despite the fact he wished nothing more than for them all to scram at the moment.

"You should go." Eddie turned to Buck again, logic raking the front seat again and he reluctivity released his grip on Buck.

"But…" Buck pouted for a second before snapping out of it. "Okay, okay. You're right." He sighed and took a step back suddenly wary and unsure. "Umm… finish it later tonight then?" he asked with a bashful, lopsided smile, running a hand through his disheveled hair.

And Eddie cursed himself for almost melting at the sight.

 _"Oh,_ you can count on it." Eddie smirked; he gave Buck a once over, eyes roaming over his body shamelessly. No longer having to hide his feelings – and the fact these feelings were returned – made him bolder than he felt in a long time.

" _The things I have planned for you include less clothes. And way more tongue_."

Buck gawked as he started at him through hooded eyes. "Dude! Now you're just being evil." He rasped and shoved at him playfully. "I still have a ten-hour shift to get through."

Eddie bit his lip to stop the laughter at Buck's frustration. But before he could say anything else Bobby shouted again.

" _Buckley!"_

"Shit." Buck mumbled under his breath. "Gotta run!" he leaned in, quickly pecking Eddie on the lips. "Love you." He exclaimed while running to their captain.

Eddie shook his head with a smile. "Love you too. Be careful!" He called out after him, even though Buck was too far to hear. He banged his head on the truck and closed his eyes, still not quite believing what just happened. _Buck loved him; he loved him! They kissed! And they'll continue it later –_

"You okay there, lover-boy?"

Eddie opened his eyes and saw Hen and Chimney in front of him, seeming torn between amused and smug. He didn’t trust his own voice enough to speak so he simply nodded, the giddy grin still attached to his face

Hen"s eyes glinted knowingly. "As happy as I am, for both of you, I am so damn thankful for the alarm."

"Yeah. I was afraid we wouldn’t be able to unsee whatever was about to happen." Chimney scoffed, gesturing to the general area Eddie stood.

"No kiddin." Hen snorted. "You know Eddie, when I said: 'be smooth'… shouting at him that you're in love with him wasn’t what I had in mind."

"Yeah. That was a bit on the nose there." Chimney threw him a sly wink. "Then again, it worked. So, what do we know huh?"

"Ha-ha." Eddie rolled his eyes. He picked up the discarded bag on the floor and turned his back to them. Mostly because he was pretty sure his face was still flushed. _Have they heard the whole thing? Or just the part where he kept yelling at Buck like a fool?_

As he began to walk to his car, he felt them fallowing him to the parking lot and he knew they wouldn’t leave it be. "So… I guess you were right."

"Well duh! Of-course we were right." Chimney said as a matter of factly, sounding too damn pleased with himself.

Hen chuckled. "We've been watching you two idiots pine for each other for _months._ It was exhausting. _"_

Eddie came to an abrupt halt _. "I did not pine!"_

They stopped in their tracks, and both Hen and Chimney raised an eyebrow at him. As if challenging him to lie to them again. Eddie felt the back of his neck burning.

"Okay fine. I pined."

Hen snickered and patted him on the back. "We know. Just please, for the love of god, do not defile the bunkers. We all have to use them."

Eddie growled in exasperation while Chimney roared in laughter. Eddie bid them goodbye as he tried to conceal his red face; opting it's better he left before he made an even bigger fool of himself. When he entered the car, he could still spot them making kissy faces at him through the rearview mirror. He groaned and slammed his head against the stirring wheel.

T _hey will never stop teasing him now._

But then Eddie remembered Buck's smile after he kissed him, and Buck telling him _he loved him._ And the softness of Buck's lips which was better than he could have imagined… and he thought, _yeah, it's so worth it._

**\--**

_"I still can’t believe I'm out two hundred bucks_!"

Eddie raised an eyebrow at that. it was Christopher's birthday party, everyone from the 118 and their families was there. He stepped aside for a moment to refile some of the snacks for the kids and when he returned, he stumbled across Chimney, Hen, Bobby and Athena hunched over a piece of paper by the table in the corner. With the former complaining loudly.

"Why are you out two hundred bucks?"

Chimney jumped. He turned around slowly to face him, looking like a deer caught in headlights, while Hen hurried to snatch the paper from Chimney's hand and hide it behind her back.

"What was that?" Eddie demanded with narrowed eyes and tilted his head to Hen.

"Nothing."

Even if it wasn't for the way Chimney _squealed_ , he still wouldn't buy it. "Really?" Eddie's brows knitted together dangerously. "Why won’t you show it to me then?"

"Huh…"

"Show you what?"

Eddie looked over to the familiar voice, noting Buck and Maddie had joined them. Buck seemed confused while Maddie eyes widen as she noticed what's in Hen's hand. _Oh, she absolutely knew something._

"I'm not sure." Eddie shrugged; his heart skipped a little when Buck draped a hand over his shoulder. It's only been a week since they kissed at the station, _and it was probably the best week of his life._ And Eddie once again found himself feeling like an idiot for wasting so much time.

Buck's finger brushed softly against his arm as his gaze followed his sister's, eyes squinting at Hen's farther poor attempts to hide the crumpled paper. _"What's that?"_

"It's nothing –"

"Oh, give it a rest." Athena intervened. She looked far too amused as she took the wrinkled piece of paper away from Hen. "Just come clean. It's time."

"It is over anyway…" Bobby mused beside her.

"Come clean? Come clean about what?" Buck wondered, he eyed Chimney specifically almost in accusation, probably cause he twitched with guilt the most.

"Umm… well you see we had this bet –"

"A bet?" Eddie repeated. He had a feeling he knew what this was about, a conversation from a month ago coming to play, and he didn’t like it. Not at all.

"Yep." Hen spoke up, and unlike Chimney she didn’t appear guilty at all. "A bet about the two of you." She waved her hand between him and Buck in a flippant manner.

Buck blinked in surprise, the hand looped over Eddie tightening a bit, but Eddie… Eddie glared at them all incredulity, feeling the anger rising in his chest. "Let me get this straight... _you bet on us?"_

Nobody moved until Maddie sighed in defeat, "Yeah, pretty much."

Buck gasped before tuning to his sister. "You were in on it too?"

Maddie rolled her eyes. "Obviously. Although I must say, you two turned it into quite the curveball." She shrugged, earning another gasp from Buck.

"Oh my god! I can't be–"

"Seriously?" Eddie shook his head, intercepting whatever Buck was about to say. "I can't believe you guys! _You too Cap?"_

Bobby gave a half-hearted shrug, a small smile forming on his lips. "What can I say? It was easy money."

Athena barked in laughter. "Not that easy hon. 'Cause apparently, no one won." She scanned over the page thoughtfully.

"Yeah. No one really guessed Eddie would try to ask Buck out and end up blurting out he loves him." Chimney sighed and swiped the paper back from Athena, a frown on his face. "Although, someone did put down money on _Buck_ doing it."

"What?" Buck cried out, his face flushing when Hen laughed _. "Who?"_

"Maddie..."

 _"What?!"_ Buck exclaimed again, looking at his sister in hurt.

Maddie chuckled. "Come on little brother, you and I both now you were _this_ close to doing it. Eddie just beat you to it. Thank you for that Eddie by the way." she said dryly.

Eddie smirked at that. "Serves you right."

"Wait, am I the only one who feels betrayed?" Buck called out offended, and the hand around Eddie's shoulder got even tighter.

"No." Eddie started when Hen and Chimney replied with a "Yes."

Eddie turned to glare at Hen and Chimney. "Shut up." he hissed.

Hen laughed with a shake of a head. "Oh, give it a rest. We're only at this predicament because of _you._ "

Eddie felt his cheeks burn. "Shut up." he said again. "Besides, _aren't you_ the one who told me to do it?"

"No, no." Hen waved her hand at him. " _I_ told you to ask him out. Everything that happened after is on you."

Eddie opened his mouth to response when he felt Buck shaking next to him. He turned to his boyfriend in shock. "Are you – _are you seriously_ _laughing right now_?"

Buck bit his lip. "No." he said, not proving quite convincing when he had to stuff his fist in his mouth.

Eddie's jaw clenched. "Buck…" he warned.

" _Oww, someone's sleeping on the couch tonight!_ " Chimney's laughter quickly turned into a pained groan when Hen jabbed him with her elbow.

"I'm sorry, babe." Buck offered, completely ignoring Chimney, only not sounding sorry at all. And Eddie pushed down at the loud thump of his heart at the pet name.

"But you have to admit, it is funny when you think about it." Buck was fluttering his eyelashes with a pout he knew very well Eddie had a weakness to. _Bastard_

Eddie cursed himself for falling for someone who played dirty like that. For a blissful second, he was genuinely considering following up on Chimney's joke and make Buck sleep on the couch.

"You're unb–"

"Oh, wait!" Chimney squealed out of the blue, causing everyone to startle in surprise. He was staring at the paper with a growing frown before turning it around. _"Holy shit."_

"What?" Bobby wondered, peeking over Chimney's shoulder intrigued.

"Holy mother of –" Chimney stopped himself and looked around, remembering how many kids were in the room.

"What is it?" Maddie asked, stepping closer to him.

A beat, and them, "Someone won."

They all started at him dumbfounded. _What?_

"It's right here." Chimney shook the paper in their faces as if he couldn’t stress it enough. "All of it. Down to the T."

Nobody moved for painfully long time.

"Wait a minute…" Eddie blinked, apparently the first to regain his composure. "You're saying someone guess betted on _exactly_ how Buck and I got together?"

"Yes."

"You're kidding." Athena breathed out, she seemed frustrated; Eddie wouldn’t dare to point out it's because she hated losing. _"Who?_ "

"There are only initials. CKB."

"CKB?" Maddie echoed back, confused.

"Huh ha." Chimney nodded and Hen plucked the paper from his hands, staring at it as if it deeply offended her.

"Who the hell Is CKB?" Buck questioned, sounding complete lost. He glanced at Eddie who shrugged back, just as baffled as his boyfriend and the rest of their friends.

" _Carla knows best."_

Their head jerked to the familiar voice to see Carla leaning on the wall nearby with a huge, knowing smirk. Eddie felt Buck's hand slip away in shock, coming to a stop at the small of his back.

"I'll be taking my winnings now." Carla pushed back from the wall and stepped closer; her hand outstretched in waiting.

Eddie gaped in amazement, eyes darting from Carla to the others, who one by one unfroze, and pulled out their wallets with a collective groan. The sound of money exchanging hands being the only noise for a drawled-out moment.

"When did you even had the time to get in on it?" he heard Chimney's grumble as he passed the money in vanquish.

"You left it on the table during Buck's birthday party a few months ago." Carla hummed in satisfaction as she rounded the bills in her hand before stashing them in her shirt pocket. Then she turned to Buck, patting his cheek fondly which seemed to pull him out of his frozen state.

"You too Carla?"

Carla laughed at his expression. "Oh, please Buckaroo, we both know I always end up tangled in the front seat in your love life."

"Hey that's…" Buck croaked, face flushing under Carla's arched eyebrow before sighing. "That's utterly true."

"Ha-huh." Carla chuckled, stoking his cheek once more before turning to Eddie. "Though I suppose half of this money is Christopher's. That kid of yours was spot on with the date."

Eddie definitely picked the wrong time to not only pick up a beer, but to also take a long gulp in celebration of his friend's downfall. He ended up coughing violently, beer sputtering everywhere while Buck slapped his back, torn between worry and laughter.

"W– what?" Eddie yelped while whipping his mouth with his sleeve. " _Chris was in on it?!"_ his shout came out hoarse and gruff due to the beer ingestion incident.

This should come as less of a surprise really. After all Chris barely batted an eye when he and Buck told him they were dating. His reaction was _'finally'_ being mumbled before he returned his attention to his homework, leaving them to stare in awe.

_Eddie's pretty sure this is the most offended he's been in his entire life because of-course his own son would realize of Eddie's feelings before Eddie himself._

Carla looked like she wanted to roll her eyes and instead shook her head impatiently. "Yeah, we talked about it all the time hon." She gave him a pitiful laugh and a pat on the arm.

"That boy is probably smarter than anyone here."

With that she was gone, and Eddie was left swelling with pride at her words.

"She's not wrong." Buck voiced his thoughts beside him, his face mirroring Eddie's feelings perfectly; and he couldn't help but stare at his boyfriend with what Chimney claimed to be a ' _pathetically-disgusting- heart-eyes_ ' on their first shift after becoming a couple.

_"Bucky!"_

Christopher's voice made them both turn around to see the boy in question clapping excitedly along with Harry and Denny. The three began chanting Buck's name together to lure him over and Buck let out a laugh before turning back to Eddie and their friends, who remained suspiciously quite during the whole ordeal.

Buck simply gave him a shrug, "Duty calls." He exclaimed, leaning down swiftly to place a lingering kiss to Eddie's lips before pulling back and disappearing towards the kids in a blink of an eye.

And Eddie leered after him, lips tingling, watching as his boyfriend quickly made his way to their son and kneeled in front of Chris only to receive a hug attack from him and the other kids. It was a good thing Buck had good reflexes otherwise he would end up buried under a pile of laughing, ruthless kids.

"You know, you two are disgustingly cute."

Eddie's head snapped to the owner of the voice, _Maddie._ She was glaring at him with a raised eyebrow and a wide grin. They all were in fact.

"Yeah, it almost makes you wish they still had their heads up their asses, doesn’t it?" Chimney pondered in a dramatic sigh. And more than one eyeroll was shot in his direction.

Hen on her part shoved Chimney playfully. "I think what Chim meant to say is, we're very happy for you, and Buck."

"Thanks." Eddie chuckled, he felt his face warming up and glanced back at Buck so they won't see him all flustered. The giddiness he felt by the sheer mention of his boyfriend's name was too foreign to him still.

 _"Aw look at him, he's blushing."_ Athena cooed.

_Well, that clearly didn’t work._

He tried to hit them all with his best scowl, reminiscing how once he used to be good at being intimidating... but apparently, his best try was an epic fail because all it obtained was laughter. 

And he was uncharacteristically okay with that. _If it meant he gets to keep being this happy, screw it!_

"By the way, just when exactly are you going to ask Buck to move in? It's important for the over-under…"

Eddie glared at Chimney, slowly assessing the mischievous glint in his eye, knowing no good would come of it. Before he could groan or utter a warning at his friend though - Chimney was already on the move, heading in Buck's direction. Eddie finally recuperated fast enough to run after him with a growl.

_"Don’t you dare!"_

**Author's Note:**

> I have most of the chapters finished. I was going to finish it all before posting but I realized if I do that, then I would never post it. So...I still need to work out the last two chapters but the next one should be up tomorrow. Thanks for reading.


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